Chapter 41

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I can hear everyone gather up in the cafeteria. I eat my 2 cans of peaches, the sloppy joe, and a nutrition bar. I drink some water, and I lay down. I regret, trying to kill myself, I really do. Especially while being pregnant. I shouldn't have tried. I regret everything I ever have done to my body and everything I have tried to do.
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I turn on my side and stare at the wall, hearing faint voices. It went silent. I couldn't hear anything.
Then all of a sudden all I hear is, "She what!?" I hear someone slightly yell. Then it goes back to quiet talking.
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I'm so tired. I just can't sleep. My eyes start to get heavy around 2:00 pm. Soon enough, I'm asleep.
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I wake up to Carl searching my bag and all of my things. I slowly sit up. "What're you doin'?" I ask Carl.
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He takes my razors, and my knifes away. "You're not allowed to have these, Taylor." He told me. "You can have your knife back when we go on runs, and if you go out to the fences. Just in case." He adds.
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"But, I'm going to need to shave my legs." I tell him.
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"Then, Beth or someone has to been with you." He tells me.
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I sigh. "Okay, fine." I say. He walks out and puts the stuff with Michonne. He comes back in.
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He lays down. "Taylor, why?" He asks me. "You're pregnant." He adds.
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He scoots over so I can lay beside him, on my back. He puts a hand on my belly. "I-I don't know. I'm messed up." I tell him.
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"You're not messed up." He says. -
"Fine, I was messed up." I say. "I regret it." I tell him.
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"Good, regretting it is better than wanting to do it again." He says. He hangs a sheet over the cell. "Strip." He tells me.
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I look at him confused. "Wait, what?" I ask him.
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"I said, strip. Take your clothes off." He says, looking at me.
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"Why?" I ask.
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"Because. Just do it." He tells me.
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"Okay?" I say, awkwardly. I unbutton my flannel and toss it to the ground. I get up and take my shoes and tank top off. I then take my jeans off. "Now what?" I ask.
He steps closer to me, smiling very very small.
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