letters ; 5sos

letters for calum 5.

dear calum,

tomorrow's the day huh? i guess our friendship would be on a wreck once you find out. especially when you and amber broke up just recently. one and a half year was kind of a waste too you know. though you told me she didn't love you. you said you had an argument about i-don't-know and her hooking up with a college dude slipped out. she said how she didn't love you all this time and how bad you were in bed.

you threw jellybeans on my windows that night and we did a sleepover just like we used to have when we were little. you said you missed those days when we didn't have any trouble with the world. i agreed because so do i. you looked at me intently and said that i should start dressing up because its almost graduation-which is tomorrow- and college is coming. you told me i would look even more beautiful too. what you said made me think hard. does that mean you find me beautiful? and if i dress up, would i look even more than that? the words replayed on my head like a broken vinyl and it kept me up all night.

i have to admit, i am beyond terrified by this whole thing. this whole thing i mean the confessing and stuff. it could change both of our lives and destiny. i could regret it or it could be the best thing that's happened into my life. but you need to know about this one way or another. so i'm risking our friendship. 

i am sorry calum for being such a coward, for not telling you this earlier, and for being such an idiot. if ever you get mad at me, i understand. i just hope you forgive me for falling for you, i can't help it.

whatever happens i just wanted to let you know that i'll always be your best friend, i love you.

              love,

            jaime