Jacob and Renesmee: Part 1

Renesmee

I lashed out in the cottage. Everything that can be broken in the sitting room, I broke. There is shattered glass everywhere, books and plants scattered on the floor with each shelf busted from the brackets they used to sit on. I ripped up the furniture like a rabid animal. My dad tried to handle me and failed. Emmett had to come lay on top of me until I stopped struggling.

This is all my fault. I should have told Jacob how I felt about him. My mind was so jumbled with emotions. The kiss, his words, everything was too much to take in. Now look what I've done. I punished both of us.

I feel empty inside. Nothing makes me happy. My mom tries to give me my iced blood in the morning and I throw it at my bedroom wall and tell her to get out. I can't talk to Jacob on the phone. My dad took it away.

"Your are going to murder him!" I had yelled to them after Jacob left.

"He knows nothing bad will happen to you." My mom said.

"I'm never going to forgive you!"

I cried his name over and over that night. My pillow still had his scent and I snuggled it until it was soaked with my tears.

Rosalie thought the smell of wet dog would go away. She was wrong. I knew Jacob wouldn't let me go unwatched for a second. Every four hours, there's a new pack member in wolf form watching from outside in the woods.

Sunday afternoon, I reside at Esme and Carlisle's house, playing the piano. I tried to play something calming but Ludwig Van Beethoven's 5th Symphony in C Minor came out of my fingertips instead. Towards the end of the song, my parents came to watch me play.. I bang on the keys as hard as I can without breaking the piano. When I finish, I stomp past them and slam the door on the way out to the cottage. I noticed Embry watching me from behind the trees. I ranted to him about the situation. He snuggled into my neck to show he cares.

On Monday night, Jared came up to my window with something tied to his neck. Jacob had him bring one of his shirts for me. I nestle my face in the shirt, taking in Jacob's scent.

"Tell him I'll see him soon and that I miss him deeply." I give Jared a pat on the head and lay in bed putting on Jacob's shirt.

"Did you and your hot guy boyfriend break up?" Joy asks me as we sit outside for lunch. "It's because he's super strong, huh? Are you worried he will break you in bed?"

"Ew, stop." I run my hand through my hair. "We are fine. My parents banned me from seeing him at the moment."

"So you are dating?" Chelsea asks.

"You should be lucky he's that strong." Joy files her nails as she pops her gum. "I wish Tommy was that strong. The things he could do in bed if he had the strength of your guy."

"Can we stop talking about sex, please?"

"Oh my god, are you a virgin?"

All three of them stare at me.

"I'm sorry I'm waiting for someone to give myself too and not to someone who will throw me away like trash."

"So, are you waiting for Jacob? Because I think that is so sweet. He seems like a good boy. So tell me, why are you two banned from seeing each other?" Hailey asks.

"It's like Shakespeare shit." Chelsea says.

"It's not important."

"Um, yes it is! Prom is coming up. You need to lose your virginity with your guy during that night. Do I need to tell your parents myself to let you two see each other?" Joy stares at me.