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Yeah — as you might know by now. The memorial is today. I don't know how I can and will take this later today. Looking at myself in the mirror, I saw a young boy, who's broken and shattered. Not really prepared to see his best friend in a casket, getting ready to go six feet under ground.
The memorial wasn't until later today, so I had enough time. When I picked up my phone I got a message from a blocked number, when I clicked on the notification the message read. "She's gone, you shouldn't have left us😈🔪"
I blocked the message, I couldn't let them get in my head — what if it really was my fault. I said to myself, I tried to block the thoughts out my head. "Mikey, i'm going next door to help Nolani's mother. Are you coming?" Uh- Um no, I mean yes. Yeah sure.
When we walked over to the Miracle's. I stood there at their doorstep with my hands deep in my pocket. Ross came to the door and greeted us, he invited us to the kitchen where Ms. Miracle was sitting crying while looking at pictures of Nolani. My mom went over to comfort her and asked to say there until it was time to go to the memorial.
As time passed by Camari came by with roses, she tried to keep a smile on her face. Like always, I could see the hurt in her face.
Near sunset, Ms. Miracle and my mom started heading to the memorial. Meanwhile, Ross, Camari, and I stayed for a while. We didn't go early, because we wanted to surprise Nolani's mother when she got back. We stayed there and set some things up. "I'll drive to the store and get the rest of the stuff." Camari said.
Okay, be careful Ross said as she walked out the door. "You think we can actually handle seeing her body in there?" Of course not, she's our bestfriend Ross. We can't even try to stay strong, as soon as we see her. We're gonna explode in tears. That's all, I said back to Ross while hanging up a ribbon on the ceiling.
☽— 𝓦𝑖𝑙𝑙𝑜𝑤'𝑠 𝓟.𝓞.𝓥.
My eyes opened while I was on the cold concrete floor. I tried to use my body strength to pick myself up, but my strength was gone. Ms. Woodhouse came and got me out of my cell and sat me at this table in her office. She sat I front of me and pulled out this book. What the fuck do you want with me, I said to her straining my voice.
"That's not the right attitude, love. I'm going to be showing you pictures of things and I want you to tell me what you see." She pulled out the first picture, and it's like my mind couldn't allow me see anything, but the — "shadows mask." I said to her.
She showed another picture, which looked similar to Nolani and the rest of my friends. I knew I wasn't actually seeing that, but it's like I couldn't help it. I tried to pull back on what she wanted me to see and what was actually there.
