𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝔾𝕠𝕝𝕕𝕖𝕟 𝔸𝕘𝕖 - ᵖᵉᵗᵉʳ ᵖᵉᵛᵉⁿˢⁱᵉ

꧁Pʀᴏʟᴏɢᴜᴇ꧂

Peter sat brooding as he gazed onto the open expanse of the Great Eastern Ocean. Somewhere out there far from his reach was Katherine. By now she would have reached Telmar and would probably be fast asleep in yet another palace.

Peter had tried many times to remove her from his thoughts and yet no matter how hard he tried it never seemed to work out the way he planned. The first few times he had been cold and distant and yet to him it always seemed to hurt him far more than her.

Other time he had gone off on trips that paralleled the days Katherine was in Narnia however, he always seemed to regret it when he did return and more often then not cut the trips short.

He had also tried moving on, especially after seeing how well she was doing without him in her life but no one ever seemed to give him the same feeling Katherine had, so for a time he gave up completely.

It was bad enough that nearly every country she went to she seemed to make friends with the royals there, most of whom were men. And that she had become so friendly with them all.

The logical side of Peter always reasoned that it was part of her job as ambassador to be friendly and approachable but the little monster of jealousy always won in the end causing him to act rashly with her for no reason.

He could lie and say he was not a protective person by heart but it was in his nature, especially with those close to him. So when he had found out about the nasty rumors of Katherine that had been spreading in the first few years of the court. Even though he had still been working on ridding the last few traces of the Witch's army he had been sure to disperse of them by the next visit she had been there with them.

Part of him wanted to ask if she had noticed and then take credit to show her how much she meant to him. But he just assumed she would not have cared so he left it. Now as he looked out to the moonlit crests in the water he could not help wandering what she felt for him.

He remembered Aslan and Edmund mentioning she might have reciprocated his feelings but he wasn't so sure. If she had really loved him she would have stayed and tried to make something work instead of leaving him to try and figure out what he had done wrong.

The worst part was he still loved her. He could not just erase the feelings no matter how hard he had tried. He had tried to be bitter, ignorant, rude, and resentful yet in the end the only one he ended up resenting was himself.

He wished that he could have had a chance to tell her exactly how he felt, how much she meant to him. But instead he had been so caught up in the whirlwind of becoming royalty. He paused his overthinking as he tried to reason with himself. It had not just been him. He had tried, he knew he had, maybe she had just been insecure.

He sighed looking back to his desk where some leftover paperwork had just been completed. He waved them around a bit to dry the ink before stacking them neatly and sitting down on his bed. In a sudden fit of irritation he pulled at the strings of his shirt and pulled it off over his head.

The white material fell to the floor as he pulled at his hair, sinking his face into his hands. He wished she had told him, after all he had been insecure to. They could have worked it out together. But instead he let her slip through his fingers.

In turn he released his blonde locks from his grasp and stared at his open hands before balling them into fists. He was tired of waiting, tired of wondering, this time he would find it out for himself. He could not change the past but it was not to late to try and change what was happening in the present.

Sighing he looked out through his windows at the sea once more. A wind blew through from the ocean raising goosebumps all over his exposed upper half. A tiny frown christened his forehead as he got into bed. He rubbed his arms once or twice with a confused crinkle in his nose.