Between Us [H.S.]

Dreams

*Author's note*

Alloe lovs!

So I was nervous about last chapter but I hope you enjoyed it.

I appreacite all of you for coping with me <3

-i.

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It's been two weeks.

I've been debating myself between two mixed feelings. I feel so much pain still for Danny's lost, Laura says I shouldn't waste my time crying over her but it's very difficult to forget someone who had your heart for so long just because they hurt you. She used to look at me like I was the only one in the room, I still remember her eyes glazing brightly at me...and I also remember the disgust on them last time we met. I know she didn't love me right the last few months but what if that's all the love I could get? The maximum expression of love I could feel for the matter. Pain was what I felt, pain and guilt. Guilt for what I did with Harry two weeks ago on that elevator.

 I haven't talked about this with anyone and I'm not planning on doing in it, ever.  I can't believe I did that. With him. I can't tell Laura. I tried to, I almost decided that was a great idea until I looked at her into the eyes and I just could't make a sentence. She hasn't talked about or mentioned Harry since Niall's party. So I guess she wouldn't mind what happened. That's what I tell myself to sleep better. Niall and her exchanged numbers and they seem to be pretty good friends. Who knows, maybe even magazines make two and two together and they leave me alone and go for her.   

The problem is, I wasn't that drunk to blame it on the alcohol, let's be real. The only drunk I felt was drunk on him. His smell, the way the touched me, how he spoke to be, with authority but being careful and making sure I wanted it. 

Consent is just so sexy to me.

His lips were soft but hard on me as he kissed me with some much force I almost fell on my knees. He made me feel so weak holding me tight in his arms. His arms. The way he grabbed me and made his way into my skin scratching and caressing every part of it making me arch my back to the wall. I can still remember his lips ghosting their movement to my ear and how his voice made its way into it as a whisper, causing me to whine in pleasure. My leg on his hip and his center connected with mine to the touch, my hands pulling his hair just enough to indicate him how much I was enjoying it.

He didn't touch me. 

God I wish he had. 

When he lowered his hand near my center that was already wet for him and the doors opened I felt like crying. 

The dreams haven't helped either. Since Niall's party I've been having these crazy dreams with Harry that only make my life a suffering of constant horniness that I don't know how to stop. It's been a long time since I  feel attracted to a man and for the most part, I've hated it. He's bad with words but so good with his mouth... 

But back to reality and like I said, it's been two weeks, and I haven't heard from him since. I get it, he wanted to have fun, to play, like I told him. At least I had fun while it lasted, even though I would like to feel like we both played this game and right now I just feel played by him. He had the two roommates, must be satisfied, two more to the collection of fucking fangirls. What bothers me the most is that I'm not. I can't even listen to his music anymore, I get horny! Fucking rockstar.

So here I am, a boring Wednesday in the life of a working student who just wants to graduate and finish annalising this damned Pride and Prejudice crap. I can't focus. I haven't being able since, you know. I just need closure. Does he want to see me? Does he want me to reach out?  Probably not, if he wanted he could have called me or texted me, who am I trying to convince? Ah, yes, myself.