Between Us [H.S.]

Perfect Day

This Friday I didn't have class, since the professor was sick,  but I still had to go to work so I woke up and did my usual coffee with a piece of fruit.

My goal today was to not think about Harry.

Well I'm already doing it saying I don't plan on thinking about him, but you get the point.

I plug my earphones and listen to some Frank Ocean while I head to the shop while munching on my Oreos that were almost over...I knew they wouldn't last long either way. I have convinced myself today is going to be a good day. Sunny, cold November morning I am wearing a pretty outfit...

I'm used to baggy clothes on a daily basis, I've never liked my stomach, my arms or my boobs too much so I try to cover them with big t-shirts and it works wonders. That's why I'm not confident undressing myself in front of others. I must admit when Harry touched my breast on the sofa for a moment I felt like...

No.

No Harry. 

Also today I'm having lunch with my dad so it seems is going to be a big relaxed day for me. What could go wrong?

Although King's Cross station is normally full of people, this Friday felt oddly empty, maybe it was the cold weather, or it could be that Christmas were around the corner and people were saving their travels for the festive days ahead of us.

Christmas were a nostalgic time for me now. I loved the spirit, the cold snowy weather, the warm cozy big clothes, the coloutful light in the streets, the carols and music of this season, the food...but with my family hasn't been the same since I came here to London when I was 10. The usual was that I had to spend Christmas with mum and New Year's here, since all my friends from high school lived here and I had almost none in Spain. But since the argument with my mum I haven't come back for Christmas and I wasn't planning to. Not that I didn't want to, of course I want to see my mother, but she...well, she doesn't want to see her daughter anymore.

Maybe this Christmas I could go back, if she wanted. But there's so much resegment and things to talk about...I forgave her long ago, I can understand that she wasn't raised with liberal morals and it's hard fo her to comprehend that I love both women and men, but that's who I am. And before my sexuality, I'm her only daughter, and I will always be. I really hope I can make her understand one day, to introduce her to my future partner and have dinner all together like a happy stable family...

Whatever, back to work, I can't be in my head all day feeling pitty for myself.

Few people passed by and some even purchased some clothes and took some lighters from the box on the counter. My father was nice enough to take two to his house so he'll sell them at work. He's the owner of an antique guitar shop and he's in love with it. He says music was and will be his first love forever, and I don't blame him, I feel that too.

I feel my phone buzzing and I look at it. I can't contain the smile on my lips when I see the nickname I have for my dad on my contact list and I remember how long it's been since we don't text and I don't see it popping up on my screen so easily. I started calling him big boss when we used to go sailing in Spain in the summer. He used to say we were both captains of the boat, and since I was smaller I would be the little boss of the boat and he would be the big boss. He always stressed the fact that I was the small one by size, but that my responsibilities, rights and freedoms were the same as his. I guess I started learning about feminism surprinsingly with my father, even though with the years I studied more on the subject and he didn't. Not that he doesn't support equal rights, but he doesn't have a woman daily struggles, and I get it.