"What the hell?!" I scream. How did I get here? I have a migrane and I feel as if my brain will explode. I try to think back. No sensible reason comes to mind.
Suddenly I'm awake. I sit in my sweat-soaked sheets. I feel like I just ran a marathon-no worse. Like someone was chasing me.
I get out of the bed and grab some clothes. I take a nice cool bath. This nightmares are starting to happen more and more. I mean yeah I have a pretty fucked-up past but can't my subconscious just get the hell over it?
The answer is no.
Hell fucking no.
Basically I live in this small town in the middle of no where. They're not exactly "up to date" on anything, at all. Everyone in this town is modeled to be the same exact way. The men work and the woman grow up to be house wives.
I know right, messed up.
Anyway somehow i turned out different. I cant be "controlled." Thats the problem in this town. They are all so afraid that if someone acts out of place, everything will be ruined. They're afraid of what people will think. They're afraid of themselves.
And I, on the other hand, don't give a damn of what people think about me. I've become insensible to what they have to say about me. I'm just over it.
But as much as I tell that to myself I can't make it come true. They torment me just because I'm different.
The water becomes colder as I forget I'm standing here. I get dressed and get ready for yet another day at school. I cant wait until I graduate high school so I can leave this town. Just 2 more years.
I walk outside and start my trek to school. Hopefully I wont see anyone from school. But of course I do once I'm only one block away from the house.
"Hey fag! What's up?" He laughs. I wonder what ever happened to boys aren't allowed to pick on girls. I walk a little faster hoping for the slight chance he might leave me alone, but no such luck. Instead a girl comes to my side and pushes me. "Why don't you just die? I mean seriously there is nothing here for you! Don't you understand? Can gays understand english?" She looks to the friend like she's asking a question putting on a extremely sarcastic "confused face."
The boy laughs "I don't even know!"
I keep looking down,but they keep pestering me along the way. At some point they say "Hey fag! Im talking to you!" And a girl runs by us, pushing the boy to the floor. She doesn't seem to care or notice him. I smirk while the girl helps the boy up.
Classes go by like usual. There's pestering and note writing. After I leave the school I see someone walking towards me. I don't recognize her but I'm sure that she will probably be coming to bully me. I intend to look down but she's really fucking pretty.
I look down and walk faster like every day. But she doesn't talk to me as she keeps my speed walking right next to me. She must be new here and probably doesn't know who I am. Well what everyone sees me as since I "stand out" so much.
She's probably not a threat to me. "Uh hi." I feel and sound like I haven't talked in days. Maybe because it's probably true.
"Hi! I'm Maddison, call me Maddy though" she says cheerfully. "Um are you new here?" "Yeah actually I am new! Can you show me around?"
No fucking way
"Yeah sure" I say with a shrug.
Why in the hell did I just do that?
"Great!" She says while clapping her hands together.
