Lacuna . k.sj.

10

I had a feeling that something was not right...but I brushed it off and welcomed the much needed sleep.

It was past midnight and the hospital was extremely quiet , the only sounds Jin could hear was of the gentle breeze outside and the chirping of the creatures of the night...Jin did not like it....the quietness made him feel even more lonely, he just wanted someone to be with him , someone who would hug him and tell him that everything will be okay. But, he knew that no-one would be here to look after him...

He  will probably will be discharged tomorrow and nothing was seriously wrong with him and he knew that Jimin needed comfort and company right now as he is more injured. So, Seok-Jin kept quiet and did not pester anyone to stay with him as he didn't want to be a burden to anyone.....

*2:30pm*
Jin opened his eyes and was horrified of what he just saw....he saw himself.
He saw himself drowning and the rest of the members looking at him and smiling as if they were pleased to see him drown . Suddenly Jin heard a voice... specifically Namjoon's voice and it said," Hehe look how pathetic our hyung is" , everyone started laughing hysterically at this. Suddenly, all the voices faded away and he saw himself near the cherry blossom tree in the hospital, talking to someone-
"Jin..."
"Jin."
"Jin!"
"JIN!!"
He was startled and opened his eyes quickly .Jin looked around and saw that he was still in his hospital room and it was still dark.
He didn't know who called his name and started to look around but he sighed as he found no one . He the remember his dream ....no.. nightmare and tears started to well up in his eyes. He couldn't get the satisfied faces of his members and their laughter out of his head. Jin was scared to be alone and hated loneliness so, he thought about how he could be perfect to distract him from loneliness . He took out his phone and read all the hate comments he got. Some people called him fat , even though it hurt him very much, he decided to eat less from now on and promised to himself that he will be thinner and try his best to be perfect.
As he was not sleepy at all , he decided to make a timetable for his eating and practice schedule.
Jin clicked on his Notepad app and he began typing

Wake up at 4:30 am
Shower and make breakfast before 5:15 am
Do some vocal excercises including two octave pitch glides and vocal cord training- 5:15 am  to 6:15 am.
Practice some of the dance steps 6:15am to 7:30am.
Eat breakfast with the members. Only eat an apple . 7:30 am to 8am.
Get ready and go to practice with the members.
Lunch ( salad only!) 1pm
Make dinner 7pm
Eat with the members (only an apple)
Practice some more 8:30pm to 9:45pm
Excercise more 10pm to 11pm
Skin care 11pm to 11:45pm
Sleep 12am.

Jin sighed and laid down on his bed , he knew that it was not very healthy to eat so less but he wanted to be thinner and would resort to any means if he could achieve the perfect body.
He then checked some of his photos in his phone . He carefully examined every single selcas and photos of himself and founds flaws in each one of them, his self hatred was spreading like wildfire.
As he was scrolling through his gallery , he found a group picture of BTS in their debut days...they all looked so happy in that photo, especially Jin . He sighed sadly , he wanted to be the happy and bubbly little boy again and he thought that he could only achieve happiness if he is perfect and flawless.
All these thoughts made his head hurt so, he laid down and tried to sleep.

_______________________________________

*Jin's POV*

I was woken up by the sound of someone continuously knocking on  the door , I sat up on the bed and told whoever it was to come in . It was the doctor , he smiled at me and said ,"Mr Kim , your physical health has improved, so you are discharged now and can go back home by 11 am. But you must come here once a week this month for a check-up." I was really happy to go back home as the hospital was  very boring and lonely, I nodded my head and thanked the doctor. After the doctor left , I decided to call Hoseok as he wakes up by this time and inform him that I was ready to go back. So, after a lot of rings , Hobi answered
" Hello , Jin-hyung?"
"Hello Hobi, the doctor told me that I can go home today. Will any of you drive me back please?"
" Oh , I'll ask one of the member to drive you back. When will you be ready?"
"Hmmm...I'll be ready by 10 o' clock."
"Ok hyung, I'll ask them and text you . Okay?"
"Okay, thanks Hope-ah. Bye"
" Bye, Jin-hyung".

J-Hope sighed after the phone call, he was glad that his hyung is discharged but he really didn't want to drive him back home as he was not at all in the mood to drive right after he woke up.

Taehyung woke up and he filled Jimin's glass with some warm water . He then saw Hoseok looking at his phone so, he approached Hobi and asked," Good morning, hyungie"
"Oh , good morning Tae. I want to ask you a favor."
"What is it ?"
"Jin-hyung is discharged and can go back home today, will you please drive him home?"
"Ummm, can't he drive?"
"What are you talking about ? Hyung didn't bring his car and he is just discharged so, we can't let him drive "
" You are right, I'll drive Jin-hyung back."
" Okay, thanks"
Tae smiled and nodded his head before going to the washroom.

*Jin's POV*

Hobi texted me and informed that Tae will drive me home. I was waiting for him , suddenly I heard a knock on the door and I told the person to come in,
it was Taehyung. He smiled at me and helped me carry my bags to his car. After paying the bills and thanking the doctor , we both got into the car.
I asked Taehyung about the members and how  Jimin was doing,  he replied that everyone was fine. We talked about some random stuff for the rest of the ride. When we reached home , I saw Taehyung getting back into the car , I was confused as to where he was going and asked," Ummm Tae, where are you going?"
He looked at me and said," Huh? Hyung I took some necessary things like our chargers and some toiletries and am going back to the hospital".
I was really shocked , I had a bad feeling that he would leave me alone in the house , but he won't do that.....right?
"W-what about me ?"
" I dropped you off so, now you can freshen up and rest. What else do you need , hyung?"
" I- ummm- are you all gonna be with Jimin ?"
"Yep, you know how much he hates loneliness....oh! Don't worry  Hyung, Jungkook will be back tomorrow so that you won't be lonely." Tae casually said as he waved me goodbye and drove off. I had a sinking feeling in my heart...he did leave me alone.....
I quickly brushed off these negetive thoughts and tried to look at the positive side. I just have to be alone for today, Jungkook will be back tomorrow and I won't be lonely.
Even though I tried to look at the bright side , I knew that everyone was with Jimin and nobody was here to look after me and it  was very heart breaking for me.....
I quickly brushed these thoughts off because I thought that I was just being an attention seeker and

Jimin deserved all the love and care , not some pathetic attention seeker like me ......

_______________________________________

Hey guys! Thankyou for reading this chapter. ❤️

Please show  support to my wonderful friend and amazing author in_pariswithlove

Please correct my mistakes in the comments if you guys find any.

Please do vote and comment . It makes me happy :-)

Thankyou again for reading

~Love you all soooo much ❤️~

Bye

~💜~