Cold as Ice (KuroKen)

(9)

Tw: Mentions of abuse and drugs

Kuroo's POV

"Kenma!" I shouted but he didn't turn around to look at me at all. I only noticed when he shuddered that he was sitting out in the snow with sweatpants and a shirt on. While the shirt was long sleeve it was below freezing and he had no jacket. "Kenma?" I approached the boy slowly and noticed he was shaking quite a bit.

"Why are you here?" His voice was more horse then normal. I walked over and sat on the bench next to him but he kept his hair over his face to hid himself.

"Are you okay?" I ignored his question and asked my own instead. He didn't answer my question and opted for staying quiet. "Kenma?" I asked again and he finally slowly raised his head. His face was red from the cold but I noticed an out of place cut on his lip and a bruise on his cheek bone. I grabbed his face without thinking and looked at his wounds. "What happened?" I tried to remain quiet to not startle him although I think my sudden movement probably did that already.

"Nothing it's fine."

"It's not fine!" I can't tell if I'm mad because my parents pissed me off earlier or if I'm made that Kenma was acting as if this was fine, maybe a bit of both. I mean it was obvious that someone did this to him. "Why would you think it's fine?"

"It's fine Kuroo it's my fault so it doesn't even matter." He answered harshly and pulled away from me. I was a bit shocked from how annoyed he sounded, I mean sure he always had an annoyed tone of voice but now he seemed especially mad.

"Kenma..." I'm not sure why I called his name. Maybe I was trying to get him to explain himself or maybe I just wanted to say it but either way he didn't react. He shivered again and only then did I realize how selfish I was being, pestering his for answers when he's sitting in the freezing cold. I quickly took off my scarf and held it out to him but he made no motion to take it. "You'll get sick." I pointed out, he rolled his eyes and took the scarf wrapping it around himself.

"Why are you out here?" He asked his previous question again.

"I was hungry, why are you out here." He sighed, leaned back on the bench, and looked up at the snow falling from the sky. "Do you like the snow?" I asked watching the way his eyes sparkles as the snow flakes feel softly on his face.

"Yeah." A small smile found its way onto his face as he continued to watch the snow fall and I watched him.

"I do too," I added still not looking away from him. "It's pretty." I couldn't tell if I was talking about the snow or the boy in front of me, I don't think it matters at this point. Kenma finally took his eyes off the sky and turned to see me still looking at him. His cheeks were still flushed from the cold and his nose was extremely pink. The black and blue on his eye contrasted the pale and pink tones of his skin. The snow was pretty, the park was coated softly in the white fluff, the sight was beautiful, yet I was looking at the boy next to me with a bruises eye and a cold face.

"What?" He asked probably wondering why I was staring at him so intently.

"What happened to your eye?" I asked again against my better judgement. I wanted to help of course but I also didn't want to push him to spill his secrets when I knew he wasn't ready. He sighed and looked back up towards the sky.

"I should get going." He stood up slowly and reached for the scarf wrapped snuggly around his neck.

"Keep it."

"Kuroo I can't keep you scarf."

"Then give it back to me tomorrow, I'll be at the rink as usually." I smirked, gaining an eye roll form the shorter boy. He left the scarf on in defeat and waved goodbye to me without answering my question, not that I expected him to of course.

Kenma's POV

I left the park feeling warm despite the cold weather around me, Kuroo's scarf felt like it was a hundred degrees. At this point I'd welcome any form of warmth considering everything else left me feeling cold. Unfortunately for me I wasn't gone for that long so my mom's probably still visiting, I could wait it out but were would I even go. I should've stayed with Kuroo, but I couldn't handle him asking me the same painful question over and over again. Even though I accepted his invitation to be friends that didn't mean I was suddenly going to spill every bit of trauma onto him. I hope he doesn't expect me to.

The next few minutes were spent wondering around aimlessly trying to go anywhere but my aunts house. I could always go home, or at least I considered it home, in reality it was an old broken down tree house in the woods not to far from here. Considering I pretty much grew up there, spending all my time held up in that tiny wooden box, it's the only home I've got.

God only knows where my dad ran off to and ever since my mom lost custody I've been living with my aunt and uncle who defiantly weren't ready to house another person. My closet bedroom is proof of that.

So I walked thirty minutes, past where I use to live with my mom, around the playground I spent little time at, and through the woods that surrounded it. A small river, or rather creek, separated the forests edge from the forest itself. Before I had to run across a fallen tree to escape to the tree house, now it seems a bridge has been built. I walked across the snow covered bridge and made my way through the familiar path which was easy to navigate in the snow, I came here year round so I was use to it. Eventually I found the old ladder, which was still in surprisingly good condition, and climbed up into the wooden tree house which, again, was in surprisingly good condition.

I didn't do much up there, I just played on my switch, curled up in the corner, and snuggled into the only warmth I had which happened to be Kuroo's scarf. I don't know what it was about Kuroo that made me want to trust him even though everything in my mind was telling me not to. My brain constantly screamed at me to never trust anyone again since it's only ever bit me in the ass yet here I was, trusting a boy I barely even knew. Why? Is it because he enjoyed watching me skate, is it cause he put up with my antisocial personality, or maybe because he seemed to genuinely care. I haven't experienced any of those before, people just don't tend to look my way. Of course it's by design since I don't want the attention, but when it's from him I don't seem to mind.

After a while my hands became too numb to move around on the console any longer and I was forced back to my aunts place. Luckily, it was around 9 now and the chances of my mom still being around where slim. Plus my aunt and uncle always went out when my mom came over to give us some 'alone time' to talk and they probably wouldn't be back yet. Another win for me, I wouldn't have to explain my bruised eye, at least for right now.

I pushed the door open to my room and plopped down on my bed curling into the warmth of my comforter. I used Kuroo's scarf to warm up my face and hands to best I could before pushing myself up slowly. My eyes quickly spotted a small note on my makeshift night stand, it was a plank of wood resting on two stacks of old book. Picking it up I read it slowly.

Kenma, I wanted to apologize for my actions today I never met to hurt you. I love you more then anything and I know I still have a long way to go to be a better mother but I am working hard to get there. I promise next visit will be different and I can't wait to see you again <3

I scoffed and tossed the note into a box filled with almost identical notes I got after almost every visit. She was always promising to do better, always saying she loved me, yet it was always the same. I always ended up hurt and she'd always leave me with these notes overflowing with empty promises. She promised me she'd get better, promised me she'd stop, but then we'd met again, she'd hit me, and run off back to whatever drug she was fixed on that week. My mom never got better and I don't think she will, but she claims to be trying hard. Yet every time she sees me it's like all her work collapses in on itself. Was it my fault? She said it was, she yelled it at me so often I began to believe it. I don't really know what I'm doing but-

My mind got distracted by the scarf still tied around me. I took a deep breath inhaling the scent that lingered on it. It smelt like Kuroo, the cold winter air, and the small cafe by my house. I silently thanked Kuroo for giving me something to anchor my thoughts and pull me out of what would've been another rough night. Throwing myself back on my bed I snuggled the soft piece of fabric until I eventually lulled myself to sleep.

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(1677 words)