Us Two And Them

Chapter 43

Romans POV

"Harl I know...I heard everything." I let out a breath I didn't even know I was holding in.

Light peaked in through the crack of the curtains. I could bearly see Harlows face scrunch up in confusion. I took her silence as a chance to explain myself.

"I think I might know why your having nightmares...well not nightmares more like memories."

Her face now seem to drip with worry and panic. I took another deep breath before continuing. Not only was it hard for her but it was also hard for me. I heard every cry and scream but yet I did nothing to prevent it. I was too afraid. I was a coward.

"As we got older and when you would send me to bed before you so you could take care of Mom. I couldn't sleep until you were in the bed with me just so I would know you were safe. I eventually learned how to relax my breathing so you would think I was asleep. I heard all of Moms cries and especially yours..." I paused I wanted to let her take in this information. She looked stunned maybe because I had tricked her or maybe because I knew one of her darkest secrets.

"I'm sorry...I'm so so sorry..." my eyes started to fill up with tears. "I could've of helped you that night...I could've prevented it if I wasn't such a coward to get out of that stupid bed...I heard everything and yet I still didn't move..I could've__" My tears started to pour. A big ball of gulit rested comfortably in my gut. Reminding me of my mistakes. Reminding me of what I should've done what I could've prevented.

Harlow grabbed my chin softly in her hands as she looked directly into my eyes her own tears falling down her rosey cheeks.

"Stop saying what you could've or should've done. You would only end up regretting what you could've done. Something tou can't change now. But think about this.. something could've happened to you if you got out of that bed. He could've hurted you. Anything could've of happened. But sometimes life takes the wrong turn and thats how life works. As they say 'If there is no wind. Row.'

"Here I am giving you advice but yet I can't seem to take it myself." She let out small chuckle. Her thumb rubbed gently away my tears.

"Maybe you should..Maybe we should tell them?" I looked up at her. She freezes while I try search her eyes using my own thumb rubbing her tear stained cheeks.

"I don't know what triggered you but I think you should tell them." I added.

She looked back up at me. "A phone call." She paused. "A phone call triggered me. He called me." Her eyes searched mine for answer. One I could not give her.

"If...If I tell them I need you there because without you I don't think I could tell them." She looked down and started playing with my fingers. Removing the hand that layed on my cheek.

This was hard for Harlow. I knew it was she wasn't the type of person who knew how to express how she felt. Admitting this to anyone is hard but for Harlow this was extremely hard since she never liked to burden other people with her problems.

Maybe this will finally help her close up that wound. Not move on because you can never truly move on from a mental scar that has cut too deep.

I nodded my head. "When?"

She was still playing with my hand. "Now" she sighed.