Rise or Crumble (Pete Davidson AU)

3.

A couple of days had passed, Pete didn't really say much after I completely overshared.  I wasn't even sure why I did, even my therapist couldn't get me to admit what went on through my head.  Mostly because I was all too aware of how selfish it sounded.  But Pete just listened, and even though we still didn't know each other, I knew he could relate one way or another.

I was glad the conversation ended where it did, Rook had called for him for whatever reason.  If he didn't, Pete would have heard the last part, that to me, was the worst of it all.  Even after everything I put my family and friends through, because I was convinced they wanted too much of this fantasy perfect girl they saw in me, I still wasn't happy.  They're entire lives were turned upside down, and now making sure I was everyone's first priority and I was still fucking miserable. 

How selfish could I get?

A random pothole the tour bus hit going 79 on the highway nearly sent me flying off the couch placed near the front.  My eyes quickly scanned to make sure no one was around to witness my near death experience.  Once determined that the coast was clear and my heart ceased to feel like it was going to beat out of my chest I laid back down and closed my eyes.

We were in our way to the first venue, which was only an hour or so from the house we were at depending on the traffic.  Everyone was pretty much doing the same thing as me, getting some sort of nap in because these boys refused to sleep when the moon was out.  I'd be in my bunk too but the Chloe girl wouldn't stop talking on the phone, it was surprising how she hadn't gotten booted to the other bus.  That was a perk of fucking one of the bandmates.  Not that there was much room for me to talk.

Just as my breathing steadied into a rhythm there was a shadow that loomed over me, I could tell by the way the sunlight no longer warmed my skin from the blasting A/C.  Only a short time while being on that bus and already I knew the summer would be filled with more caffeine than humanely possible.

I peaked one eye open and was graced to the see the gorgeous British guitarist smiling down at me. His red hair looked like an absolute mess, yet like it was done on purpose because it was perfect on him. It wasn't until Dom's lips started moving that I realized my headphones were still in. Quickly pulling out one of the buds I still only caught the tail end of what he said.

"Sorry, what?"

"Said you beat me to the hiding spot, that Chloe bird is a loud one, ain't she?"

A giggle spilled from my lips, so it wasn't just me thinking it. Still, I chose not to verbally agree, wanting to be in the good graces of everyone here. But that didn't mean I didn't feel bad for the guy. Without a word I sat up a little and gestured for him to sit. Once he did I laid back down, this time my head on Dom's lap.

"What are you listening to?" He asked while playing with the ends of my hair.

"Some rapper, uh– Nex Cassel."

"Let's have a listen, then."

I retrieved the earbud that was dangling off of my shoulder and handed it to Dom. The song was restarted and we listened peacefully for a few minutes. That was the nice thing about musicians, they knew how to listen. Whenever showing Harley or my other friends new music, they decided 30 seconds into a song if it was worth their time or not. Not caring about the technique of the instruments, only worried about if it was catchy. Catchy wasn't a bad thing, just so, limiting.

"What language was that?"

"Italian."

"Do you understand him?"

"Mhm"

"Are you fluent?"

"I am."

"Wow. You know when I was younger I used to put music on that I didn't understand while doing my homework to help me concentrate better. You know, because it couldn't be completely quiet or my ADHD would go off the rails. Of course it didn't work too much and I was still stupid but at least it got me into some sick K-pop bands."