Oxford Boys

39. secrets

Since we've come back a week ago, I spent most of my time at Jake's place. I love Emi and honestly, she's my bestie and that's one of the reasons I also decided to spend more time at Jake's place. Ian is around a lot at the moment and she's so happy with him, I feel like disturbing them. And seeing as my moods have been up and down, I thought it would be best to give her some happy time.

Besides Jake keeps pestering me during school, to stay the night at his place anyway. The great side effect, Jake keeps me distracted well during the night. Evans is a little pissed, when we don't walk back together after work but I guess he understands why I need this right now. Once he had heard from Emi what had happened he even thought about skipping classes too and coming down to help Jake and me prepare the funeral.

Even in this hard time, Evans never fails to put a smile on my face at work. He's simply Evans, the thing I love most about him at the moment, he's the only one not to treat me like I am going to break apart any second.

Another reason why I am staying away from my apartment at the moment. Emi gives me the wary look every time she sees me, as if I was a fucking volcano ready to burst any second and simply crumble down into pieces right after it. Yeah, a fucking comet has hit my own planet and at the moment everything is off axis again, but I can't deal with everyone waiting for my planet to implode through the impact. I had my fucking breakdown and I'd be a liar to say it doesn't hurt. Yes, I lost the last part of my family and a part of me will never be whole again. The dinosaurs on my planet no longer exist, therefore I know there are other wonderful beings trying to gain life on my fucking planet.

I am Samantha Jones and if life has taught me something, then it's not to give in. Life fucking hates me, great. I'll show this fucking life I am ready to kick it's balls. Evans sees this girl in me and I know Jake does too. The difference between the two of them I guess is, Jake saw the state I was in last week and he knows I might fall again.

Jake has given me a key to his apartment so I can come and go as I want, even if he's at the gym or something. Last night I spent the night with Emi, we binge watched Shadowhunters for the millionth time. We can literally speak most of the parts along off by heart. And it reminded me of Jake's and my outfit for Halloween. Apparently, we were the most interesting couple of the night. Guess it had to do with Jake really dating a girl for the first time and making it so obvious.

Tonight I am spending the night at Jake's place again. As it's freaking pouring down with freezing rain, I decide to take my car I have inherited. Thank god I find a free parking lot in front of the house, which is very seldom the case in this town.

Half way up the stairway, I can hear loud yelling coming from Jake's apartment. For a moment I think about coming back later, but I'd rather not go out in the rain. I'll simply wait in the hallway of the apartment until things are settled a little.

Damn I know those voices. I push my key in the keyhole and try to stay as quiet as possible. If Jake needs me, I am ready to jump in and stand at his side.

"Since when are the two of you back together anyway?"

"Fuck you, it's none of your fucking business."

"Oh but it is. What the hell did you think of even going back there in the first place?"

"Her Grams died she needed me. I love Sam. Something you dad, have never even heard of."

Damn I really should have waited outside, this is none of my business. On the other hand it is, for some reason his dad obviously fucking hates me. If I leave now it's too late anyway, they'd hear me.

"You say you love her? You didn't just risk us all, you risked her just as much."

"What? You think they are going to claim the money back for the house from Sam? The money they paid her Grams for her shutting down the files about the rape?" Jake spits with disgust lacing his tone.