Oxford Boys

50. moving on

A/N I left some of my spelling mistakes on this chapter after editing as I didn't want to lose the extremely precious comments on some paragraphs in this chapter just because of editing, it would break my heart

4 months later

Emi wraps her arms around me while I take a last look around in my room and take the last thing standing on my night table in the hand. A photo from Jake and me as youths, Emi had taken it secretly during one of our first kisses. My heart skips a beat looking at the happy couple. Little did we know what we would have to go through. I press it hard against my chest.

"So much for boys, booze and party", she sighs.

"We can still stick to party. I may be pregnant but not sick. I'll just skip the other parts. I'm sure some distraction won't harm me."

Emi came back during the night of the gun shoot, after Evans had given her a call. I know how sorry she is about not telling me the truth about how my mum got killed and what really happened with Michael and his family. She stuck day and night with me, taking terms with Evans while I was crying my balls out. I don't think me or our little baby would have survived the shock of all what happened if it hadn't been for those two.

Just thinking about that night brings the tears back to my eyes, I press the photo harder against my chest.

Michael's court case will be coming up in two months. Surely, I will need them all again then.

"You know you can stay. I haven't given the room to anyone else yet."

"You should Emi, I told you I can't stay here. Even if Michael is in jail, everything here reminds me of that night and all the other things that have happened. I need to move on, need to finally put an end to all of this and live my life. You know I rarely sleep in this room anyway as every time I see the terrible pictures in front of me, seeing Jake in the pool of blood, it simply terrifies me being here. I know this isn't how we had planned our time here in Oxford, but we will both learn to deal with it. And after all I'm only fifteen minutes away from here."

"Yes I know, closer to the skatepark", she chuckles. "I'm here for you, you know that don't you? You have plenty people here loving you and when panic comes up you have plenty shoulders to cry on."

"I hope those shoulders will be ready to babysit in between too", I chuckle.

"Oh if you don't hand on your fuck off attitude to the baby, I am sure there will be plenty. You've got a whole skater crew behind you."

"And you think they won't be running away from full nappies? After all they are guys."

"Gross, even I will be running away from them. But I am quite sure Evans isn't going to mind too much. He's all nuts about this baby already. Never seen a guy like that, especially if it's not his own child."

"Well you know Evans, his heart is huge. Talking of which, he's probably already waiting in the car with my last boxes. You coming across later on? Guess I could do with some support."

"Sure guess Ian won't be coming anyway."

"Still trouble?", Emi simply nods. Gosh these two need to figure things out badly.

"Could you give me a short second on my own in here?", I ask Emi.

"You going to be alright?", to be honest I don't know, but I need this last moment to myself, so I nod.

Once Emi has left the room, my hand moves over my now growing belly caressing it lovingly. I try my hardest not to remember the night Michael appeared here, even if the blood stain in the carpet makes it nearly impossible. As hard and often I tried to scrub it away, it never faded completely, guess who ever is moving in next will need to exchange the carpet.