Shield maiden ~ Vikings

»21«

Aila watched in enjoyment as two men played a board game. Spending the evening and the night at the camp had been more fun than she had originally anticipated it to be, and now she stood next to her brother as the men played. One of them hissed, then threw two small dice and made a move of his own, sighing.

"I take it he's the one losing?" Aila asked. Avan hummed, grinning at the sight of his man getting more and more frustrated. "It looks complicated."

"At first, yes." Avan said. "You get used after a while. It's fun, not like the chess they play here."

"The only reason men play chess is to get better at strategizing?"

Avan raised a brow. "Strategizing?" He asked. "And does it help?"

Pursing her lips, Aila shook her head and said, "No, I doubt it. If you win you're already good at it, if you lose then it does not help you. I myself would never rely on my skills with a board game to aid in a battle." That's stupid.

"Battle." Avan mumbled. "Will there be one?"

Aila looked down. "Almost certainly."

The man who had been losing all game finally lost and groaned loudly, throwing his head back whilst the other laughed in triumph and mocked him. It had been fun to watch, but now Aila thought of the war Ivar would likely drag them into, and of everyone's part in it. She hated her mind and her way of thinking. Thinking of Ivar, and Harald, and those on Lagertha's side, everyone on Ivar's, made her thing of that fucking Bishop.

I'm so stupid, She cursed herself for kissing him, and for feeling something. Enough of that! Bloodeye snapped. She did not come to lament over kissing a Saxon, she came to be with her brother, her own flesh and blood. This small camp felt more like home than all of the north now.

"Something is on your mind." Avan said softly.

"Something stupid." She muttered. "I'd rather not think about it."

Avan said nothing, only pouted her lips as he thought of something. After a few seconds of silence, Aila turned to him to ask,

"What?"

"No, nothing. I won't mention it."

"Now I almost want you to."

"Are you sure of it?"

Aila nodded.

"Do not think that I've not noticed the Christian's eye on you, or yours on him." Avan said.  Aila gulped and quickly turned away to stare off into the distance, feeling her face heat up. "And I also realized that you and Ivar are together early on. So which man is in your thoughts?" He asked.

In a small voice, Aila asked, "Is it bad if I say both?"

"I suppose only if you hurt either or both."

"Hmm." She hummed softly. "I don't know what Ivar and I are anymore." Aila finally admitted to herself. It was a question she often asked herself, did they have a future together? "We drifted apart for some time, and I no longer seek his comfort."

"And the Saxon?"

Had he asked her that question the previous literal night she would have likely damned the Saxon to hell, now she thought something else.