polaroid angel - dreamnotfound

˖⋆࿐໋₊ 𝘧𝘪𝘷𝘦

"george, follow me to my office please."

carlos looks serious. he never looks this serious. i can feel the anxiety building up. what have i done this time? please don't fire me.

he must've been lurking outside the door to be able to grab me right as we finished shooting. the photographer was nothing special, all he wanted was a few posed shots for some new clothing line of his. fall themed; knitted knee highs, and woolen oversized sweaters. i quite liked the outfits. usually i'm naked, or almost naked, so this was nice for a change.

"what's up?" i ask as we enter the elevator.
"i just want to have a quick chat."

well that's reassuring.

i try my best to hide my nerves on the way up, but it's hard when you're stuck in a small box like this. for some reason the thought of showing my weak side to those working above me is terrifying. it's probably not uncommon though. not wanting to ask for help or advice because you're scared you'll seem dumb. pretending you understand something to avoid confrontation, even though you don't have a clue what you're doing. common stuff.

we make our way past casual conversations, hardworking economists, and graphic designers on lunch break. the building is always bustling with life around this time of day. it was scary in the beginning, especially for someone like me who isn't used to so much social interaction. but nowadays it's all background noise. i've constantly got places to be, and no time to worry about people.

carlos unlocks the door to his private office, nicely stowed away in the very corner of the 41st floor. this place has become all too familiar to me during my time at the company. carlos cares for his employees well, and likes to schedule regular meetings for evaluation. he really does value our wellbeing the most, knowing that this industry can be tough on your mental health. i couldn't wish for a better boss, honestly.

"alright, have a seat," he orders, all the sounds of the corridor outside disappearing as he closes the door behind us.

i slip into the black, padded chair, conveniently placed right in front of his big baroque-styled desk. he sits down in his own chair, clearing his throat before he starts speaking.

"so, how are things going with dream?"

the question catches me off guard.

"u-uhm, good, i guess?" i mumble, "why?"
"well, we're thinking of hiring him, so we want some reference," he explains, "you've already done two shoots with him, how does it feel?"
"i don't know, it feels good so far, h-he's very kind, and talented, of course."

silence sets in. carlos tilts his head, observing me with furrowed eyebrows.

"is there something else that you're not telling me?"
"what makes you think that?"
"you're stuttering, george," he points out, "you only stutter when you're nervous. makes me believe that you're hiding something."

i bite my lip. goddamn it, why does he have to be so good at reading people? can't tell a single lie around him, ever.

"it's important that you voice any concerns you have, we're discussing a future employee here."
"that's really all i have to say. he seems like a nice, genuine person. i've enjoyed working with him, at least," i shrug, refraining from spilling the whole truth. my boss doesn't need to know about our dinner, or how attractive i think dream is. or how he kissed me on the cheek just a few days ago.

a smug smirk materializes on his lips. he places his elbows on the redwood desk, clasping his hands together.

"so you're not," he coughs, "interested in him, by any chance? i know it's not my place to bring this up, it's uh, not very professional of me, but i've seen the way you look at him when he walks by, george."

fuck. i have been defeated.

an intense shade of pink spreads upon my cheeks. i attempt to hide it with my hand, but to no avail.

"is it that obvious?"
"kind of, yeah," he chuckles.
"ugh, leave me alooone, he's hot okay!" i whine, rolling my eyes.
"i've heard that he can be quite a charmer. watch out.."

this. i like this. i like when me and carlos can talk and joke casually, like we're real friends and not only coworkers. we've interacted outside of work before, and i've even gone clubbing with him once. not the best night out i've ever had, but we did do a lot of crazy shit together. you couldn't believe that he's over ten years older than me. still a teenager at heart, i guess.

"i'm joking, i'm joking," he laughs, "but thank you for your insight. i'll take it into consideration."
"so he'll be hired?" i gasp, maybe a little too excitedly.
"if the rest of the process goes smoothly, yes. the company could definitely use some fresh, young faces."

i nod, relieved that i'm not fired. was that serious look he pulled on me really necessary? this wasn't a big deal at all.

"i've seen the photos from those two shoots, by the way. dream has pushed really hard to get them published even though they were only gonna be tests."
"really?"
"yeah, and i'll make sure to grant him his wishes," carlos confirms, "those pictures are way too unique. it would be a shame to let them go to waste."
"thank you carlos," i grin, the subtle compliment cheering me up.

"you've worked so hard, and it's paying off. i personally believe you can go really far, especially with a talented photographer like dream. he's passionate about you, i can see it in his work. you two have serious potential if you stick together."
"so you're saying that-"
"i'm saying that i want you working with him a lot more. prioritize it. other shoots are unimportant for now, okay?"

i can't believe it. it's like everything is forcing us together. not that i mind, not at all. i would pose only for him if i had the option.

"o-okay, fine by me."
"perfect, then i believe we're done here," he declares, allowing me to stand up.

on the side of his desk, right by his computer, is a framed picture of his family. his wife, his two twin boys, and their adorable german shepherd. i eye it one last time before pushing the chair in, getting ready to leave the office.

"see you around, i guess," i smile, grabbing the doorhandle.
"wait, george!" he exclaims.
"hm?"

i turn around to face him once again.

"go get that cake."