But To Live Does Not Mean You're Alive (BoyxBoy)

Chapter Two

I arrived in school just few minutes before my first period which was Biology. I went to my locker just be welcomed by a note that has the word FAGGOT written boldly on it.

Honestly, I feel sorry for the trees being cut down every minute and end up being used senselessly. I just picked it out, I sighed, just another piece of paper that will be tossed to trash.

I got the books and notes that I would need for classes, and then all of a sudden I had the urge to pee. I shut my locker and pack my things quickly.

I kind of hate it when I rush because I would tend to end up missing some things. It is never  good to start your day forgetting something.

Not wanting to prolong the agony of holding back the urine, I hurriedly find my way to the bathroom. As I was pacing along the hallway, I could not help but notice people giving me looks. They must have thought that it is normal to stare at somebody like they were some criminal.

Immediately I felt completely intimidated so I brought my head down. Needless to say that I am socially awkward, making friends has never been my thing. In the first place, it is not like anybody would want to be friends with me though.

So having this kind of attention makes me feel uncomfortable. I picked my speed as the hallway started to get swarmed by students heading to their respective classes.

Why do the bathrooms in this building have to be situated a little far and secluded from the hallways? I sighed as I finally got closer to my destination which was just around the corner.

I turned left to where the male’s bathroom is located. But as soon as I raised my head, the relief wore out hastily, and the complete opposite of it took over.

There I came face to face with none other than Connor Evans.

Connor Evans sure is one person I would never wish to meet on the way. Not now or ever. I felt my body froze, my mind told me to run but my body argued that it was no use.

I am no match to a jock. Considering also the fact that his loyal “followers” were just right beside him, left and right, five of them in total.

That got me feeling helpless, but mostly hopeless. I brought my head back down as fear decided it for me. I mentally crossed my fingers.

I waited for the punch or smack or backhand, but it never happened. It was silent, though it was disturbing. After what seemed to be ages, Connor finally broke the silence.

“So what you doin here fairy?” As far as I’ve known bathrooms are basically for comfort purposes. To be more specific it is where you answer nature’s call. I said that sentence mentally.

The mind is the only place where I could get away being sarcastic. I kept my head down unsure of what to do.

“Are you deaf or something?” Came another not so bright of a question. I shook my head. No.

“Then fuckin answer me” He half yelled making me flinch.

“I... uhh.. I’d l-l-like to use th-the bathroom”. Stuttered my obviously anxious self.

He stepped closer towards me with his “army” surrounding the two of us to prevent anyone from seeing. That was when I fully realized that there was no way out, I was getting it.

It scared me though, they have never beaten me this early before. Are they changing schedules now?

Connor closed the distance between us; I felt my body tensed up even more. With my head still pointing down, I looked at the rhythm of his right sneaker as it was being tapped.

Great, now I find tapping of the foot the most interesting thing. I noticed that he withdrew his left hand out from his pocket and suddenly, I felt strong ball of fist gripping my hair.

He pulled my head up, an action which reminded me of my father. My gaze was forced to meet his. He had all the advantage, he was more than 6’0 feet and I was just me.

He examined my face for awhile as if like he was reading it. I remained still as I was restricted to make any movement.

“You look hideous! UGLY! Your bruises suit you though”.He spat at me with an evil smirk on his face.

“Just do it man, what’s with the chit chat and hold up”.One of his blonde jock friend spoke. The rest of them seemed to not care. The blonde jock’s comment seemed to fuel Connor’s anger.

He sneered, then just a split second after, his right hook connected to my cheek. Pain immediately built-up. Following that was the taste of blood coming from the inside of my cheek.

My head was still being lifted by his strong grip. My eyes stung, tear accumulating from such pain.

How can he be this cruel?

Right when I needed it the most, the bell rang.

That was the cue for Connor to release his hold.

“Save by the bell, must be your lucky day”. He said with the hint of amusement in his deep masculine voice.

He walked past me, intentionally bumping his muscular broad shoulder with my much vulnerable one. I dropped to the floor, I could not help it anymore. I broke down to tears.

For once, I was so down that I did not care if anyone would see me. I hugged my knees as I rested my head to it. I felt like I was nothing.

Maybe it was an understatement; I should not feel like nothing because I really am nothing.

Letting all the weights escape out of me through tears, I somehow felt a little better. I spent the whole first period crying, it felt bittersweet. I should not have done it; I could have drawn attention to myself.

But then again, no matter how much I desire to be left alone at peace, it just seemed impossible as long as my name is

Kurt Adams.