Belong (D.M)

Part thirtysix

Sometimes memories can be your best friend or the worst form of torture. He learned that the hard way, trying to entangle his happiest memories with her, the girl he loved, from the scared ones of this other side of his life, the side filled with darkness and destruction. He stood at the top of the astronomy tower, looking down at the ground beneath him. Some days he just wanted to disappear, to be done with everything he was facing. He just wanted to be free. And as he stared at the ground, parts of him longing for death, he heard someone walking up the stone steps of the tall tower.

"Who's there?" he called out, quickly turning around.

"It's just me, Ellie"

"Ellie" he breathed, looking at her.

"Hi" she said, walking over to him "I figured I would find you here, how are you?"

"I'm fine" he said, turning to look at the view before him once more, not longing for death as much with her by his side.

"You say that a awful lot, but you don't look fine"

"I'm fine I promise Ellie" he sighed, looking at her "how about you? How are you?"

"I'm alright"

She stood next to him, resting her hands on the cold reeling at the edge of the tallest tower in the castle. He was dressed in his usual stylish all black, a turtleneck sweater keeping him warm underneath his suit jacket.

"I saw you earlier today" she hummed, gazing at the sun that was setting behind the hills in the distance "on the seventh floor"

"You did?" he questioned, turning to look at her.

"Yes, I saw you enter the room of requirement"

"Oh" he breathed, looking back at the view before them.

"What were you doing in there?"

"I-I needed a p-place to think" he stammered, gripping onto the reeling firmly.

"Don't lie to me Draco, I've seen you on the seventh floor many times before, it's surely not the first time you've gone into that room"

"I-I can't tell you Ellie okay?" he snapped, turning to look at her "I can't tell you why I'm in there"

She stood quiet for a moment, trying to break through his barrier with her eyes.

"Come on Draco, I love you" she breathed, taking a step closer to him "tell me what's going on inside your head, I'll still love you afterwards I promise"

"You don't really love me Ellie, you can't possibly be that stupid sweetheart"

He was a mess of gorgeous chaos, she could see it in his bright eyes.

"I do love you Draco, more than anything" she said, reaching out to touch his arm. He flinched beneath her touch, and his eyes flickered from her hand to her face. Something was causing him great distress.

"I love you too Ellie, and I can't help but love you even though I try not to" he breathed, his jaw clenched "I never meant to love you this much, it just kind of happened, but I can't love you anymore"

"What?" she asked confused, pulling back "what are you talking about? You don't want me anymore?"

"That's the thing Ellie" he cried out "you're perfect, a bright light in the darkness and a joy to the world, and I can't help but want you, I have this feeling inside of me like I would die without you and that's how I know that I have to find a way to stop loving you, cause I can't lose you, I won't survive it"

"You won't lose me Draco"

"Yes I will!" he screamed, grabbing a hold of her "I will lose everything, he will use you against me, cause that's what he does, he takes the things you love and turn them against you"