Belong (D.M)

Part fortytwo

Pain is meant to be felt.

Draco looked mortified, and he parted his lips to speak but no words came out.

"What now mr Malfoy? Cat got your tongue?" professor Amycus Carrow spoke, taunting the blonde boy.

Draco sat quiet, his bottom lip quivering as he stared at her with panic in his eyes. She suspected that the professor did not pick Draco as of coincidence, she knew there laid more beneath the surface. Draco held knowledge of dark magic, but was reluctant to use it, and now he was being forced to do so on the girl he loved in front of his whole class. There was no possible good outcome for him, and professor Carrow knew what position he was putting the broken boy into. Either he tortures the only person at this school who loves him for who he is, or he refuse and his whole class will see him as a weak failure. He didn't want people to believe he didn't have the stomach to do it, just as he didn't have the stomach to use the killing curse against his former headmaster.

"Go on boy, do it" Professor Carrow spat, staring at the pale boy "or are you sympathizing with this mudblood?"

"I don't have to do anything you tell me" he spat at the professor, gritting his teeth "I already perfected the cruciatus curse, no need for me to practice it"

"I'm not asking you to practice it mr Malfoy, I'm telling you to show us it, right now!" the professor shouted at the pale boy, growing angrier and angrier by each passing second. Neville looked mortified, Luna was looking down at her hands and Draco looked at her as if he didn't know what to do. 

Professor Amycus Carrow took out his wand and pointed it towards her, and she felt her knees going weak.

"Do it boy or I'll do it!"

Draco sat still, terror clear in his eyes and his bottom lip shivering.

"Crucio!"

Draco, along with the rest of the class, gasped as the angry malicious words left professor Carrow's lips. He sat frozen as he heard her scream out in agony. Neville quickly covered his ears, turning around.

The curse hit her body, making her fall to the ground. The intense excruciating pain consumed her quickly. Her vision blurred and her ears rang as every particle of her being burned. It felt like hot knives were cutting into her skin, and she was sure that her head was going to explode at any given minute.

"Stop!" Draco screamed loudly, standing up and getting his wand out "expelliarmus!"

Professor Carrow's wand flew out of his hand, and the sinister spell was broken. She felt her tense body relax slightly, and she stared at the ceiling not able to focus her gaze. She felt exhausted, and her whole body ached. 

"Class dismissed" professor Carrow said, picking his wand up from the floor "see you in detention mr Malfoy, you can join your beloved mudblood friend"

The classroom cleared out quickly, and Amycus Carrow left with a swift look of amusement upon the pale boy. The cold room was empty, and she laid on the floor perfectly still, unable to move her body. He rushed over to her, kneeling by her side.

"Ellie" he whimpered, stroking the hair out of her face "Ellie I'm so sorry"

She heard his voice as the ringing in her ears faded out, but she could not bring herself to get any words out, her body was too tired and hurt. 

"Ellie" he breathed once more, pulling her up into his lap "can you hear me?"

She nodded her head ever so slightly, leaning on him. They sat on the cold stone floor, and he held her, stroking her back. She winced at every small movement, and she felt as if she was getting a fever.

"Ellie I'm so sorry" he cried out "I didn't know what to do"

"It's not your fault" she whimpered, her voice barely audible.

Silence filled the classroom as she closed her eyes. She felt light headed, and the light from the windows were making it worse. Draco held her, crying quietly as his chest hurt with the burden of her pain.

"Do you want help Draco?" a soft voice spoke.

She opened her eyes slightly, and in the doorway stood a blonde girl dressed in dark grey and blue. Luna Lovegood. Draco's head snapped to look at her, and he looked uncertain as he nodded his head.

"It's alright" Luna said as she walked into the classroom, kneeling besides the two of them "I find it rather awful what they're doing" 

She helped him lift her up, offering the both of them a comforting smile. Luna and Draco helped her up the stairs to the painting of the fat lady. Luna, who happened to know the password to the Gryffindor student home, opened the passage.

"Neville! Ginny!" the blonde girl called out. 

Neville and Ginny came running to the passage, and their eyes fell upon the three students before them. One Gryffindor, one Ravenclaw and one Slytherin.

"I need to go" Draco mumbled, heaving Ellie into Ginny's arm before he took off, brushing the dust off of his black trousers. Ginny, Luna and Neville helped her into her dorm where she laid down, finally able to rest.

....

The following day she snuck down to the dungeons, looking for him. She hid behind a old rusty suit of armor as she waited patiently for the pale boy. 

"Draco psst" she whispered as she saw him coming out alone of the passage in the stone wall leading to the Slytherin common room "psst over here"

He turned to her, quickly pulling her out of her hiding place.

"Ellie? What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to thank you for what you did for me yesterday" she said, tucking a stand of her messy brown hair behind her ear.

"I didn't really do anything" he sighed, looking away.

"You did what you could, thank you"

He looked back at her with sorrow and guilt lingering in his icy grey eyes.

"Anytime" he sighed "like I told you... I would sell my soul in order to keep you safe, not that it matters anymore"

"It matters" she said, reaching out to touch his arm "can we please talk?"

"You want to talk?" he asked, looking at her with furrowed eyebrows "I thought you hated me"

"I couldn't possibly hate you Draco"

His eyes wandered around the dark corridor for a moment before he nodded his head, grabbing her arm and pulling her with him into a abandoned classroom. He got his wand out and locked the door behind him before he let go of her arm. She turned to look at him.

"Talk" he murmured, looking at her with bright eyes.

"You know how to perform the cruciatus curse?"

"Yes, my aunt taught me" he sighed, looking away "but just because I know it doesn't mean I want to perform it, it's quite... awful, especially when you're at the hand of it"

"What do you mean?" she asked, leaning against a dusty desk "you've cast it before?"

The pale boy nodded, pain forming on his pale face.

"Twice yeah, Thorfinn Rowle and Antonin Dolohov"

"Death Eaters?" she asked.

"Yes" he nodded, putting his hands in the pockets of his Slytherin robes "they went to Tottenham Court Road to catch Potter after we got word that he was there but they failed so the dark lord made me torture them"

"I'm sorry" she said, looking at him "must've been horrible to see"

"Yeah, my mother cried later that night" he mumbled, biting his bottom lip to stop it from quivering. 

Draco Malfoy was talented and clever, much to everyone's disbeliefs. The boy was very possessive over the things he held close to his heart, and wanted to be in control at all times. He seemed to hold a almost obsessive need to protect his mother.

"How is your mother anyways?" she asked, jumping up to sit on the dusty wooden desk.

"Better now that my father is back"

"Your father is back?" she asked surprised.

"Yeah, the dark lord broke him and the other death eaters out of Azkaban this summer" he said, his eyes wandering around the dark classroom "it's been quite hectic at our house, seeing as the dark lord isn't too pleased"

"He's angry with your father?"

"Not just angry" Draco sighed "vengeful almost, he's taken our beautiful home as his head quarter, it's always filled with people now... and death"

"Death?" she asked, observing the broken boy's every move.

"Professor Burbage didn't resign, the dark lord killed her right in front of me"

His voice broke as he looked away, and she felt sorrow fill her heart.

"She's dead?"

"Yes and more will die Ellie" he sighed, clenching his jaw "it's inevitable"

"I don't get it" she said, looking at him "why does the Carrow's dislike you so much? You're a Malfoy I mean, a fine pureblood death eater or whatever"

"Things are not as they used to be Ellie, not since my father failed to bring the dark lord Potter's prophecy... see the dark lord was not very pleased to learn that most of his followers had been thrown in Azkaban and he blamed it on my father, thus he became vengeful, wanting to break us down into nothing"

Draco had throughout the years managed to become so well hidden behind his facade of wealth and power. He bottled up his emotions so much that he found it almost impossible to open up to anybody, and he hated the idea of ever being seen as vulnerable. He feared that anyone would see him as less than great. He went through life telling himself that Malfoy's don't cry whenever he felt himself hurt or slip away from the cold fearless front he put up. 

But now, when all he knew had fallen, it was hard to keep the tears away. The once so highly thought of Malfoy family had lost so much of their influence amongst the Death Eaters and their regime, making even their future uncertain. The dark lord might have liberated his father from Azkaban, but he had taken their family's home away from them. Nothing in there was as like he knew it from his childhood, and his family was breaking apart. Bellatrix and Snape had both surpassed Lucius Malfoy's once so high ranking amongst the dark lord's inner circle despite the fact that he had turned his son into a weapon who had helped kill Dumbledore. 

"I was blinded by fear and anger, craving some sort of attention and greatness to prove to him that my father was not to blame" Draco continued, taking a step closer to her "so when he gave me the task of killing Dumbledore I thought it was because he saw something in me, he didn't though, he knew from the very beginning that I wouldn't be able to do it, he knew that in the end I couldn't bear to cast the killing curse"

"He sent you on a suicide mission" she breathed.

"I suppose so, that's what my mother said too" he mumbled "he wanted to punish my father and the best way to do so was by killing his only soon and send his wife into great distress"

"I'm so sorry Draco" she said, jumping down from the desk.

"Yeah well my family is at the bottom now, and the dark lord never seems to lose an opportunity to humiliate and exploit us because of it, I suppose he found it amusing to torment me with the task of torturing Rowle and Dolohov" he mumbled, swallowing hard "the Carrow's seem to copy their master's behavior, seeing as they find great pleasure in mocking me, it's ridiculous really, they used to be so jealous of my father and now this... they think of Crabbe and Goyle as so much better than me only because of their eagerness to cast those seriously dark spells, they have no clue what actually casting those spells does to you, it seriously messes with your head"

"I'm so sorry Draco" 

"I deserve it" he spoke weakly, drawing in a deep breath.

"No you don't" she assured him, taking a step closer to him "no one deserves torment like that"

As she looked at him she could see his young heart slowly fading away. Every atom of her being missed him. And she could not fight it any longer, so she fell into his arms and he hugged her closer than he had ever done before, like he was afraid that she was gonna slip away. She dreaded his actions, but his arms felt like home.