draco malfoy imagines

heather (song fic)

Summary: Y/N wishes she were the girl Draco fell in love with.

Warnings: lots of angst, self-doubting (UR ALL BEAUTIFUL QUEENS NEVER DOUBT YOURSELVES), and even more angst (as if I haven't already written enough sad ones🥴)

House: (you choose)
Year: 5

A/N: this is a song fic guys - lyrics are in bold italics. but omg this was so fun to write but low key sad too. I PROMISE the next imagine will be a fluffy one guys. also um there's no dialogue in this one lol

•••

i still remember
third of december
me in your sweater
you said it looked better
on me, than it did you

You sat alone in your common room, reminiscing about a day in December; a day you spent with Draco.

It was a good day. A day spent by the frozen-over Black Lake, him giving you his green polyester sweater, the two of you running around like idiots in the snow, neither of you having a care in the world. It wasn't a date, though. It was merely a day, just like any other day, that allowed you to spend some time with your friend.

You and Draco were friends. That's it. Of course, you wanted to be more. But Draco never knew, and now it was too late.

Now, he was in love with her.

only if you knew
how much i liked you
but i watch your eyes
as she walks by

You wish Draco knew of your abiding love for him. You wish he knew how you would literally die for him. You wish he knew how you would give anything and everything just for him to be happy.

He was happy with her, though. And you knew it was incredibly selfish, but you wished he was happy with you instead.

God, you just wished he knew.

what a sight for sore eyes
brighter than a blue sky
she's got you mesmerized
while i die

It was the girl Draco couldn't keep his eyes off of. You always noticed the looks they gave each other, how Draco subconsciously smiled in content whenever she laughed. You saw how much chemistry they had. Everyone saw. The two lovesick teens were the talk of the school.

You hated how you always got that sick feeling in your stomach whenever you overheard people taking about them. You didn't want to admit it was jealousy, you didn't want to be that kind of person.

But fuck, you just couldn't help it.

why would you ever kiss me
i'm not even half as pretty
you gave her your sweater
it's just polyester

The girl had Draco's green sweater draped over her shoulders, the same sweater that you had borrowed on that memorable day in December. You still remembered exactly how it felt on your skin, how warm it made you feel in contrast to the cold temperature the air was on that particular day. You remembered how Draco had lent it to you without a second thought, gently placing it on your shoulders with a warm smile on his charming face as soft giggles escaped from both of your mouths.

Now, it was her shoulders he had placed the sweater on, the same smile on his face as they both giggled, just as you two had. Except this time, he had placed a chaste kiss upon her lips.

Now, you felt cold again. It wasn't the same type, though. It was a different, unexplainable type of cold.

Now, you were sure you had lost him to her.

but you like her better
wish i were heather

Her name was Astoria Greengrass; a gorgeous third year Slytherin who was at the top of her class, both her beauty and her grades incomparable. Any guy would be crazy not to fall for her.

watch as she stands
with her holding your hand
put your arm 'round her shoulder
now i'm getting colder

You picked at your food with your fork, a lump in your throat as you watched Draco put an arm around her shoulders. She smiled big and rested her head on his shoulder before he kissed her forehead affectionately.

He was so affectionate with her, it was funny. You never thought Draco would show his vulnerable side in front of anyone other than you. Now, he had no problem showing it in front of everyone in the Great Hall.

And now you felt as cold as ever. You still felt the ghost of Draco's arm around your own shoulders. You could still hear the sound of him laughing at your pathetic attempts at being funny. You could still see him smiling adorably at the subtle compliments you would give him, to which he would reply by complimenting you back.

You had realized that none of that meant anything to him anymore.

Or maybe he just never cared in the first place.

but how could i hate her
she's such an angel
but then again
kinda wish she were dead

How could you hate her? She was one of the nicest people at Hogwarts. She was selfless. She was intelligent. She would do anything and everything for the people she cared about. She was an angel. It was impossible to hate her.

But then again, you kind of wished she were dead. It was awful, you knew, but you wanted to hurt her. You wanted her to feel the pain you felt. You wanted her erased from Draco's memory.

But Draco was happy with her, and Draco's happiness mattered most to you.

Even if it hurt like hell.

as she walks by
what a sight for sore eyes
brighter than a blue sky
she's got you mesmerized
while i die

Whenever you complained to your parents about something, they'd say, "Life isn't fair, darling." You always thought the saying was so simple and boring and overused, and that people just said it when they didn't have any good advice to give. You didn't think it held any deep meaning.

But now, it somehow did.

why would you ever kiss me
i'm not even half as pretty
you gave her your sweater
it's just polyester

You were stupid to think Draco would ever kiss you, that he would ever look at you with heart eyes, that he would ever love you in more than just a platonic way.

Perhaps if you had confessed your feelings sooner, before Astoria came along, Draco might've told you he felt the same. You could've been happy by now. But none of that happened, because life isn't fair.

but you like her better
i wish i were heather

You knew she didn't mean any harm, but you felt astonishingly angry at her. Not only did she take the boy you loved from you, she took your best friend. It was as if Draco didn't have time for you anymore. You barely talked. Hell, he barely even spared you a glance anymore.

And you had no one to talk to about it. It was actually quite ironic. He used to be the person you would talk to about everything. He used to listen to you rant, or let you cry on his shoulder as he comforted you until you were smiling again.

But nothing lasts forever.

why would you ever kiss me
i'm not even half as pretty
you gave her your sweater
it's just polyester

You looked at yourself in the mirror, pointing out everything you didn't have that Astoria did. Perfect eyes. Perfect nose. Perfect lips. Perfect hair.

And Draco.

She had Draco, and you didn't.

but you like her better
wish i were

And you thought to yourself,

I wish I were Astoria.

•••