Butterfly || Jin

11 - Time Passed

...

"Memories fade, feelings change, people leave but heart never forget"

...

Three years. Even after three years, they are still waiting for him. He wished for them to move on, he wished for them to forget about him but they didn't. They cherish every moments of them together.

He wished they hated him. A heavy sigh leaves his mouth. Night is really cold.

But he likes cold night the most because he could wander around without anyone noticing him. After all, he used to be in an idol group so people do know him.

People don't come out on cold night, they rarely do that. And that is what he likes the most on cold nights. A time alone near Han River.

Losing in his own mind, a figure sits right next to him, quietly. Coming back to his sense, he turns his head to his left.

Not quite surprised but still is.

"You hate cold, you shouldn't be here on cold night like this" The person says, looking straight into his eyes.

Jin was lost for words. He didn't expect to meet him like this.

"I hope you're doing well, you don't need to say anything to me, I know I'm interrupting your time"

Jin looks away, he stares back at the scenery catching the sight of the water flowing away slowly and gently.

"I hope you didn't cry anymore, we did as what you told us to do. Everyone is holding on together..."

"...on our last will"

Jin closes his eyes, hearing the words.

"Take your time. No matter how long you need, we will wait. We started as seven, we've met like that so let's become friends until the end"

Jin quietly wipes his tears that shortly fall.

"We didn't change our numbers. I know you didn't change your number either so just contact us whenever you wanted to. Don't hesitate-"

"Namjoon-ah" Jin cuts softly.

"Yes?" Namjoon looks at him in the eyes again.

"Please go"

It pains Namjoon to hear that and it pains Jin too, to mutter that. A heavy sigh from Namjoon, another ten minutes passed in silent before he decided to leave the place.

"Don't cry anymore, call me when you need me" Namjoon says as he touches the elder's shoulder sending him his last glance before walking away.

Truthfully speaking Namjoon realised that Jin has been always here near on odd days. He take notice of a man looking so much similar to his dear brother Jin especially on cold days.

But fearing that the man will run away from him, Namjoon just eyes the man for the time being. For months and this is the first time since he noticed Jin that he brave his self to accompany the eldest.

Namjoon wonders what is on Jin's mind. As he's been watching him for months, Jin always looks deep into the river, eyes glistening with maybe tears...?

Why? He choose to be happy, he choose to walk away on them but why the hell Jin is still looking empty or maybe it was more like hurting than empty.

The same thought Jin has been thinking. Why aren't they move on just yet? It's been years. Maybe another year they will finally give up on him right?

Just like that another year passed by. He didn't run onto Namjoon again after that night. Bangtan must be busy. Of course, the quiet disappearance of Jin shakes the whole media. Not only in South Korea but the worldwide media.

...

Jungkook hates him. Jin knows that.

He ran into Jungkook yesterday, both of them stood there in silent, eyes meeting eyes until Jungkook broke that. This is what Jin wants. This is what Jin always wanted, for the members to hate him.

For the members to hate him until finally they move on with their life. The life without Kim SeokJin and Bangtan's Jin.

Jin didn't have even a word to say to Jungkook however his heart broke a little to see the younger look at him with hatred. After all this is what he wanted for. Why is he the one who is hurting when this is what he wants?

He couldn't mutter a hi or even a bye to Jungkook. Not when Jungkook walks passed by him just like that. To be left alone, to watch someone leave you. That's fucking hurt.

But Jin did that to them too. Does he has the right to feel hurt?

His eyes never leaving the silhouette of Jungkook. He wanted to shout an apology for at least once. He wanted to ask for forgiveness, right at that time he knows, he couldn't live with them hated him.

He wanted to shout a forgiveness, for them to not hate him but does he has the right to do that when he is the one who walked away from them?

As Jungkook was so close to disappear from Jin's sight, Jin eyes started to glow with tears. He didn't think for so long, he runs to Jungkook, aggressively wiping his falling tears away.

He grabs his wrist, stopping the younger from walking. He grabs his wrist as if his life depended on the hold.

Again, they stood there speechless.

"I-i" Jin tries but his voice is not stable.

He didn't want to appear sad, weak and fragile to the younger so he kept himself together. He needs to ask for forgiveness.

A slap.

The younger slapped his hand away. Why are his eyes looking at Jin with so much hatred? With so much disgust?

He pushed him away from the path, he walked away without turning back, he left Jin there looking at the hand he slapped away.

Tears couldn't stop flowing from his eyes. He never wanted this. He wanted them to move on without him in their lives but not to look at him like what Jungkook did to him.

He couldn't even imagined how would Hoseok react if he is the one he run into. Just like Jungkook and Taehyung who were partner in crime, Jin and Hoseok were the same.

They brought the brighter mood to the team each and every time they're facing tough situations. Hoseok must be hating him the most.

Of course, after all Kim Seokjin is the one who convinced the others to keep running together. In the end, the same person is the one who walked away first.

Ah, Jin should go back to his home. He should go back and stop thinking about this. He needs to stop thinking about the hate in their eyes if they see him just like Jungkook.

Just like that, again time passed by.