Stuck in the Middle

Chapter 34

I ended up calling Esmeralda around noon to come pick me up. I had had enough of sitting alone in the hospital's hallway. My mother hadn't once left the room since I left it, so I knew she wouldn't miss me.

I regretted it as soon as I got into the car, though, when she gave me a look that made me squirm in my seat.

"I'll only drive you if you tell me about this boy you're seeing on the way back," she said.

I sighed, slouching in my seat. "I don't want you to judge me," I muttered, staring out the window at the other parked cars all around us.

She pulled out of the parking space, not saying a word. I thought she was going to drop the whole subject until she finally spoke, once she made a left onto the main street. "There's nothing you can tell me that I could judge you for, mijo."

I looked at her, but she was staring straight ahead as she kept driving. At a first glance, she looked relaxed, but I've known her long enough to recognize the signs that pointed toward being stressed, probably running through a million different scenarios in her mind about what kind of relationship I was in.

But, all things considered, I supposed dating both my roommates wasn't nearly as bad as what she was probably fearing I'll say.

So I said it. "I'm not exactly dating one guy." I took a deep breath as I watched her hands grip the steering wheel tighter. "I'm dating two. We're all dating each other."

The car swerved and jerked a bit as she pressed a little too hard on the brakes coming up on a red light. I grabbed the edge of my seat, grateful I was wearing my seatbelt, but regretted saying anything while she was driving. So much for not judging me.

After a very long minute or two, long enough for the light to turn green and for Esmeralda to start driving again, she spoke. "Are you happy with them? They treating you good? You being safe?"

I let out the breath I didn't know I was holding. "Yeah. Yes. To all of it."

"Than that's what's important, no?"

I nodded, turning my gaze out the window again. The world blurred around us as we sped down the street. I wished I was on my way back to school instead of the house, but I knew that wasn't going to happen for a few more days. At least I was able to escape the hospital a bit early today.

"How long are you staying here, mijo?"

I shrugged, not shifting my gaze from the trees outside. "Longer than I want to stay here," I muttered, sinking lower in my seat.

When Esmerelda stopped at another red light, she rested her hand on my arm, making me look over at her. "What is it you do want, then?"

She was looking at me with such concern in her eyes. That look was so different from the cold look my parents always gave me. She cared. She always had cared.

I sighed, then glanced out the windshield. "The light's green," I said quietly.

She removed her hand from my arm and kept driving. She didn't press me further for an answer, which I was sort of glad for. I didn't exactly know what I wanted, not really.

Neither of us said anything by the time we got back to the house. Although it was a comfortable silence, I couldn't stop thinking about her question. What did I really want? I wanted a normal family who loved me. I wanted to not be stuck here, feeling alone despite having Esmeralda with me. I wanted to go back to school, to be with Marc and John again. To hang out with TJ and hear all about his new relationship with Austin, or whatever it was the two of them have. I wanted to go back to the place that made me the happiest I'd ever been.

After she parked, Esmeralda was about to get out of the car, but I stopped her. "I wish you were my family," I said softly. "Instead of them."

She gave me a small smile, her eyes glassy from holding back tears. "You'll always have me, mijo." She took a deep breath, shaking her head. "You must be hungry, though. Let me make you some lunch."

I followed her inside, feeling better now that I'd admitted that. And once I had some food in me, I felt even better, especially because she made her famous empanadas for lunch.

While she cooked and then we ate, we had a much-needed light-hearted talk. I missed talking to her, really talking. I even told her all about Marc and John. Well, all except the things she really didn't need to know. I left those details out, for obvious reasons.

"How far away is your school again?" she asked me, grabbing my now empty plate.

"About four hours."

She nodded, placing both plates into the sink. "You want to go back? Come on, mijo, I'll drive you."

"Really?" I exclaimed, unable to keep the smile off my face. "You'd do that?"

"You're obviously happier there." She wrapped her arms around me and I leaned into her embrace. "Being here is only going to make you feel worse." She then kissed the top of my head, patting my arms a couple times. "Go get your stuff together. We'll leave as soon as you're ready."

I shot out of my chair to give her a proper hug. I couldn't begin to explain how grateful I was to have her, for her to give me that option. I was just so relieved I didn't have to stay here for another three days, pretending to care about people who clearly didn't care about me.

But I couldn't just leave without telling them. I sighed, backing out of the hug. "What about my parents? My mom? She asked me to come here for a few days. I can't just leave."

"Let me handle your mother. Don't worry about a thing."

It wasn't long before I was all packed up and we were on our way back to my school. I felt ten times lighter than I did all day. I even felt excited to surprise my boyfriends. I kept texting them as I had been all morning, but I kept it a secret that I was on my way back. Four hours felt like nothing compared to the three days we were all expecting.