Why Me?

53 9 17
                                    

Ariel is still unable to accept that she is a cancer patient and is on her way to meet her end soon. Nonacceptance leads to denial, denial to face harsh reality and here Ariel is no exception to it. Ariel begins to think why did she get cancer? There are millions of people who are bad and make this planet hell then why did God choose her to suffer, to die just like that, is she that bad to deserve death, that too by a painful disease.

Ariel's P.O.V starts .....

Why the heck I got this tumor? What bad deed I did to get such a punishment. God don't I deserve to live ? There several sinners who don't deserve this beautiful world then why did you choose me to die like this ? I want to go to school, hangout with my friends, enjoy with my family. I have still so much to discover then why god .....why are you doing this to me ? Why did I get this life when it is too short ?

My brain has a clot but still my brain is in it's overthinking mode now, these spiraling questioning are making my soul restless. I really wish to get answers to my questions. God at least now send an angel or someone to guide me because I feel lost with no way or purpose to live the remaining days of my life.

Ariel's P.O.V ends....

Ariel was contemplating the idea of death, the temptation to live and was also wondering why did her life turned upside down all of a sudden.

The idea of death was enough to make Ariel curl in her bed.  Alice entered Ariel's room she saw that the food kept on the side table was still untouched. Alice saw Ariel curled up in the bed, her pillow was wet with tears. As a mother it was enough to break Alice's heart, but Alice knew she had to be strong and show her daughter the light of hope which could guide Ariel.

Alice caressed Ariel's hair, and she spoke softly, Sweetie why didn't you eat the dinner yet ? Should I make something else for you Alice spoke out, I am ain't hungry as this tasteless broccoli soup makes my taste buds cringe and mommy why are you so worried about my food, my medicines, my clothes, my bathing and other stuff when I will ultimately die and rot in a coffin !”. Alice looked Ariel with tearful eyes and by now Ariel realized that in the fit of anger and frustration she had spit out the venom of cruel or rather heartbreaking words towards her loving mother who has been up all night whenever Ariel vomits whole night, who takes Ariel to the loo when she can't get up on her own from the bed.

Guilt took over Ariel's heart and tears replaced the angry expressions on Ariel's face. Ariel spoke politely I am so sorry mother, I didn't mean to hurt you. All this, is just too much to handle. I am irritated and frustrated with all this suffering, why am I suffering like this ? Why did god choose me to die like this ? Why did I get such a short life ? Now for what purpose should I live further and still suffer from cancer in the last few days of my life? Mommy why god chose to make me suffer ? Why me ?”.

Alice replied “It's okay sweetie, you need not apologize to me because I know you are suffering a lot and if I had been at your place, I am sure I would have behaved worse than you, anger and frustration naturally comes in such testing times. My child God never chooses anyone to suffer because he loves his creatures. God test his believers by giving them hardship to see how much strong is their belief on his divine power, he chooses only a few people to face hardships because he wants them to be stronger for their own good and for this world “.

Ariel asked Mommy, how can me being stronger help this world?”. Alice replied, ” You asked me that this world is full of bad and negative people then only why you are suffering ? Listen on this planet some people just come and die without doing something great in their own life or doing something good to the world but there are some people who came to this world to inspire people, who not only stood strong against their hardship, but also they changed this world, inspired this world which led to their names shine brightly even after they left this world. Sweetie god has not punished you, he has rather given you a chance to be stronger, to explore this world from a whole new vision, to make a difference to yourself and in turn change this world.

Ariel don't cry because you will leave us, smile because you were here with us. Thank God for what all he gave you because you have what millions don't have, like you have all perfectly formed organs, limbs and senses to feel, interpret, appreciate and embrace this beautiful world. You are chosen by God to do something great to yourself and this world”. Ariel now smiled listening to Alice, because Alice gave a new hope, guidance and a light to Ariel's own darkness of fear, anger and despair.

Ariel's P.O.V starts....

Woah God ! Are you faster than the internet speed of my house's internet router, I mean I was just asking you to send some angel or someone to guide me and within just a few seconds, God you immediately send my angelic mommy to guide me. It is strange how we take the blessings we got for granted and we're just crying in testing times, curse our fate and even blame the god who gave us this life.

How can I forget Helen Keller who was born blind and deaf but still she never complained to god or curse her fate instead she loved and lived her life to the fullest inspiring people around the globe even now.

There are so many people who never bowed to illness or disability instead they transformed their obstacles into opportunities by their positive attitudes towards life.

I need to live my life to the fullest until my last breath, yeah..... I need to embrace my dear life before it ends. Furthermore, I need to be my own light to my darkness of tumor. Furthermore, I know I am dying but just faster than everybody else. Life depends on how we see the glass of water whether we see it half filled or half empty.

Ariel's P.O.V ends....

After that Ariel kept thinking about how can she see her life with positivity and embrace it happily in the final days of her journey of living . Ariel has finally decided to live her remaining life with smile, happiness and content. Now she needs to find a pathway which can give her happiness, peace and inspiration to people around her.

Wish List   ✔Where stories live. Discover now