Can't Stop Wanting You. (EDITED)

Chapter 30- The talk.

Lily's POV- (5th March)

Oh my god. I'm pregnant. This is the last thing I want or need right now! I have lost my boyfriend, I'm moving acorss the world, I have nothing secured in my life right now and also I'm still seeing a psychiatrist, becuase I'm also crazy, because of my looney bin ex. 

My mind is whirring and I look at the blue curtain that is seperating me from the other patients in this room. I'm no longer taking in what's being said.

"Lil?" I hear as I feel Tom push my arm slightly to bring me back into the here and now. "What?" I say blinking a few times.

"We're having a baby. You're pregnant babe" he says with a smile on his face. He's happy about this?

What am I thinking, of course he's happy about this, he didn't make any secret about wanting more kids. But I'm not. I'm not ready.

"What are my options please?" I say feeling overwelmed. I can't do this.

"Hey, hey, hey. No.... look at me Lily. LOOK AT ME" Tom says sternly. I look at him with tears in my eyes. Tom has a look of panic on his face. I told him I don't want a baby. And I'm definitely not doing it by myself.

"I can't do this by myself Tom, I told you I DON'T WANT KIDS and you knew that. I'm not going to drag this child with me as I try to keep my life moving forward, I just can't do this on my own-" I'm cut off by Tommie kissing me.

This is a passionate kiss, his hands on either side of my face and our mouths straight away open together and move like they know the same dance. Like we are supposed to do this together. As we kiss my tears roll down my face.

Tommie pulls away and wipes my tears. "Hey you aren't doing this alone baby girl. We are doing this together and it might seem crazy right now with everything we've been going through, but I came to the court room with you today to show you I was there for you and that I want to always be there for you. That means right now, with this news and the amazing thing that's growing in your womb right now, I'll be here and we are going to be together and we will get through this together. Okay?" He says with both hands still either side of my face looking me dead in the eye.

I sniff and nod slowly, a few more tears falling down my face.

"I just don't know how we are going to do this Tommie. I can't live with you, not with how things were, but I also can't be away from you. I don't know what to do." I say as more tears fall and I sniff again as I wipe them away.

"Hey it's okay. I'm going to sort everything and you aren't going to stress anymore. I understand now what it's like to not have you in my life and I can't live like that Lil. And you know what, I don't want to. But more than that, I don't want my kids to not have you here either. Our kids. Our 3 children, should all be living together with their parents." More silent tears fall down my cheeks as he lays his hand over my stomach.

I nod my head and lean closer to him as he leans down and kisses my lips again.

When we pull apart, I realise that the doctor is still sliently stood there. "Sorry, Lily do you still need someone to come in and give you all of your options?"

I shake my head as I hold onto Tommies hand. As long as we are in this together we can do it. It's scary and I'm not sure how I feel still, other than scared shitless, but knowing I'm not going through this on my own makes me feel better.

They bring in an ultra sound machine next to see what the baby looks like. There's also a midwife who comes in called Sarah, who introduces herself to me and Tom and goes through everything for us as well as telling us she is our midwife during this pregnancy.