Learning to Be Happy Again

Have This Instead: Water and Fire Forever

A/N: It seems that I've written a marellinh fic instead of a new chapter, so instead of giving you nothing, I'll give you this. It's something, right?

The grass around me sets on fire when you start laughing. It's small, and I manage to put it out before you notice. I don't even remember what you're laughing about. Probably a mishap during our training session. I've been getting sloppy lately, partially on purpose and partially because when you're around me you fill up my senses and there's no room for much else. I make mistakes on purpose to keep that feeling, you, around longer.

"Marella, what's up? You've been quiet today," you, Linh, my favorite person on this terrible planet, ask.

"Oh, um, just tired I guess." I scratch the back of my head. "I didn't sleep super well."

You turn towards me, looking worried, which is cute. "Aw, oh no, why?"

I smile. "Oh, just normal stuff. Sometimes it happens you know?" In reality I couldn't stop thinking about you. Your smile, your laugh, just everything. I'm not really sure when I started feeling this way. It just sort of went from intense appreciate for your help to, well, love I guess.

"Are you sure you're alright? Your face is all red." Your hand goes to mine, and I look away. You're so close.

"I, yeah, I'm fine, Linh, really. You don't have to worry." I can tell the words sound like a lie, and honestly, I'm not sure if I am lying. While I've come to embrace these feelings over the past few months, they haven't gone away, and there's no way you could feel the same. You've had enough prejudice thrown your way, and definitely don't need more. I don't want to do that to you.

"I will though. You can't avoid that. Is there," you take a breath. "Is there anything I can do to help?" You've scooted closer somehow. So close I could just reach out and--but no. I can't do that to you.

I scoot back on instinct, and your face falls. Damn it. "Really Linh. I'm perfectly fine. Please don't worry."

"Look, I don't know what's bugging you, but I know it's something. Marella, please, I can take it. I want to help, but I can't help if you won't tell me. We have to stick together, you know? Like cognates, but, uh, different." She waves her hands, blushing. "You know what I mean!"

I sigh. "Linh, I. Well." I'm sure my face is bright red, and suddenly I feel warm. No, don't burst now. I clench my fists to try to keep the flames from bursting forth.

"Marella! Your hair!" Linh yelps, and then I'm covered in water. "I, sorry, your hair was on fire, I wasn't thinking, I'm sorry." She reaches for my hair. "Look, see? It's a little singed."

"Oh, uh, thank you." I turn my eyes down.

"So, you wanted to tell me?" Linh asks, not moving.

"I, well..." I trail off, not daring to look into your eyes. "I really like you Linh, I'm sorry." And then I brave it. Your eyes are beautiful, you know. And they look... happy?

"Oh!" Linh gasps, and then leans closer. "Me too." And you kiss me.

And then I link my pinky with your's, both of us beaming. "Water and fire forever, huh?"