Forbidden Desires {book one}

chapter 8// have your cake

nikki's p.o.v

I walked through the curtains, the dim lighting backstage feeling comforting after the bright lights in the ring. I made my way to catering, earlier today running through my head again like a movie I can't stop replaying.

"What happened a couple days ago was a mistake." A mistake? For some reason, just hearing that word come out of Roman's mouth makes my heart stop. I know that he's married.

I've known it for some time. But I just can't help myself. I can't explain how or what I feel for him but when I see him or I'm around him, everything stops.

I can't quite tell what I want from him. But it's more than just sex. He's great at that but it's just so much more to this man. He's more than just an object to me.

He's someone I want to understand, someone I want in my life. Someone I just can't get out of my head. He's there all the time.

I walked into catering, grabbing a bottle of water before heading for a table. "Nikki!" I turned my head, seeing Alexa standing in front of me with Mickie. "Hey you did great tonight!"

I smiled "Aww thanks! I'm just glad to be back honestly. It felt like forever." "You can't even tell, you haven't missed a beat."

I smiled along with her, hearing half of what was being said. I focused my attention on the table to behind her. Roman sat back in the chair, his arms crossed against his chest, staring at me.

I felt a twitch in my chest, the word repeating itself once again. "But anyway, I gotta run but we'll talk later okay?" I turned my attention back to the conversation. "Huh? Oh yeah, see you girls later."

I watched as they walked off, our eyes meeting. Stop it, stop doing what you're doing to me. I shook my head and grabbed my water before leaving my table.

I made my way to my locker room, already sensing his presence around me. Stop. You said this was a mistake. So why are you doing this? I stopped walking, turning my head slightly.

"What?" "Nothing." I turned around, his eyes on me. Burning through me. "Stop following me." "No, I want to talk." I scoffed, turning back around. "We talked already. I hardly doubt you've changed your mind about this."

I tried to walk, only to feel his hand grip my wrist. I felt time stop as his chest touched my back. "I didn't mean to say that. You know that." "Do I?"

Are you doing this because you have feelings for me? I tried to wiggle of his grasp, feeling his grip get tighter. "Stop." "You stop. You're just horny. Let go." I felt his grip loosen. "It's more than that.." I looked at him. "Is it?"

I felt my wrist slip from his hand. I walked towards my locker room door, a sudden urge to cry attacking me. I walked into the room, ready to close it, only for him to stop it.

"Roman-" I felt his hand grip my face, kissing me. Stop. I can't stop. I dropped my bottle, slowly losing myself to his lips. I couldn't hear or see anything. I could only feel him. His hand on my chin, his lips on mine. His arm wrapped around me, pulling me closer to him.

The taste, the smell, the closeness of him overwhelming me. I felt the tears run down my face as we kissed.

I heard him groan as he lifted me up, goosebumps rising on my skin as my back touched the coolness of the wall. I moaned against his lips as his fingers grabbed onto me. I don't want this to ever stop. I can't let you go. I would let you have your cake and eat it too, if it meant that we would've never have to stop.