The Art of Love

"Just like Rick and Sam"

All night long he came in and out of her dreams. At first she thought it was real and her heart leapt up in her chest as she ran to him only to wake herself up and realize that she was still in the stateroom, and the door was still locked. She sat quietly in the bed after allowing herself a good cry. She racked her brain trying to understand why Fabri was being a gentlemen with her. For such an evil man; why was she not dead, or raped or both. He didn't need her to find the painting. She had no idea where it could be. He could have killed them both on the ship, but he didnt. Why? The longer she tormented herself the more she missed him. Can. "What if he thinks you were in on it?..... What if he thinks that this whole thing was you trying to get to the painting?". Her heart was racing as panic began to take over her mindset....her voice which had been too quiet for too long suddenly decided to speak and it wasn't saying anything she wanted to hear. "You know he has trust issues, and with women especially. How many times will he doubt you, and will you be able to convince him that you had no part in this debacle?" Sanem pushed her hands up into her hair and squeezed her head as tightly as she could trying to stop her thoughts from spinning out of control. "He has to believe me. I didn't know any of this. I didn't even know him then. Oh Allah, please even if I never see him again, please don't allow his last thought of me be of someone who he despises. I couldn't bare it." Sanem rocked back and forth as she held herself tight. When she finally fell asleep she did so swearing that she would find a way out if it was the last thing she did. 

Can opened his eyes and his head immediately told him it was a bad idea. He felt as if though a hammer had been used to pummel his brain into unconsciousness. He tried to sit up but that was a bad idea as well. His stomach boiled and rolled and he knew it was moments before he would be sick. He fell out of bed and onto the floor and half crawled and clawed his way to the bathroom before his insides spilled out. He had overdone the whiskey and then the vodka trying to stamp out the guilt he felt for not being able to protect the woman who he had fallen madly in love with. She was gone, and the person who had her was the single most dangerous man she could be with. He couldn't help himself from thinking of what she might be enduring right now, but he knew that it would be his fault and he didn't think he could live with that. His head pounded and his skin broke out in a cold sweat as another wave of gut wrenching spams took over and he emptied what was left in his gut out into the toilet. He had always been able to hold his liquor, but he had never intentionally drank enough to put himself into a coma. The days had blended into one and he wasn't even sure he knew what day it was anymore. The call had angered and then frightened him for her, but Fabris second call was worse. It was no longer a veiled threat but a promise. If he made one move to try and find her, her parents would be dead and he would make sure that she knew who was at fault. Fabri wanted two things. Can would help him acquire both, but only after he gave the command. Yigit was one and the painting was the other. The thought of Sanem hating him for the loss of her parents paralyzed him. Both he and Emre called off the assistance they had acquired. Then they waited. He had been waiting since then. He knew it was selfish but he simply couldn't stop his brain from thinking of the thousands of ways she could be hurt right now. Each one of them was a lash to his heart and his soul. He needed to find a way to her and he needed to do it fast but how? How could he do it without endangering her parents? Once she was safe he would do whatever it took to kill Fabri and he wouldn't care what happened after. She didn't deserve it and it was his fault. His need to have her with him had proven too great and he exposed her to a world she should never have known. The fact that she knew Fabri before had not put her in danger, Yigit had done that but he had knowingly allowed her to stay on when he had found out their connection and that was his fault. He would never forgive himself for that. Even if he found her, even if she miraculously was unscathed he would never deserve her again. He wouldn't be able to look at her without feeling profound shame for his actions and his behaviors. His anger and jealousy had blinded him to the danger they had been in from the beginning. Now she was gone, and he was rolling in his guilt as much as he was his own bile. He felt the stinging of the salty tears as they fell on his lip that was split from his fight with Jack or from the drunken stupor that made him fall down a flight of stairs. His body shook from the effort to stifle his need to wail but he simply couldn't allow himself the luxury of it. Several knocks on his door went unanswered. He heard his brother calling for him but he couldn't face him now. Emre had tried to convince him that they would find her and that they would get her back but he knew his brother well enough to know that he always looked on the bright side of things even when the bright side was only the lights of a train heading right at them. "Abi...... open the door". He wanted to sink back into the hole that the alcohol provided for him, but the thought of the booze made him want to retch again. "Abi......dammit.....we found the boat". His brain froze and for a moment he thought he might just live to see her once more. The pounding on the door continued until he unlocked it and cracked the door open enough to see his brother standing with a worried look on his face. "for fucks sake Can.....you look like shit." He stared at the blue eyed man in front of him. Tall and muscular and wearing a scowl on his face. Before he could say a word, Emre shoved the door open and pushed his way in taking him with him. "Emre...get off. Where is she? Tell me you found her. Where is SHE?"