Selcouth [G.W]

chapter 34

!TRIGGER WARNING!

• Somewhat detailed mention of rape

• signs and detailed descriptions of disassociation.

• brief mention of eating disorder

• signs of PTSD

!Go at your own pace and read with caution!

Viridity(n.)- Naive innocence.

Millies P.O.V

Jovial?

No, it's not Jovial.

Content?

Kind of... but not that either.

You feel happy.

Happiness?

Is that what this is?

I felt warm. Not burning like I am when I'm angry. It's the type of warmth you get when you take a blanket out of the dryer or when you've been inside an air-conditioned place during the summer and finally walk back out into the heat.

That type of warmth. The warmth where you feel like you're flying. Your head feels light and your body tingles.

It's a serene feeling. There are no thoughts in my head besides one...

George.

George's hair, George's lips, George's kindness.

George, George, George.

It's a strange feeling, liking someone. It's like every thought you have can always be tied back to them, every room you walk into your eyes always try to find them.

It's even more strange because in theory none of these feelings feel new. New in a way because I now acknowledge it but it's like I've been subconsciously feeling it.

Looking for him, being drawn to him.

Everything he does draws me in more and more. It feels like I'm walking towards a cliff in a way.

It's miles away from me but I can still see it in the distance, I can feel the anticipation growing with each small step. My heart races and my thoughts soar on what could be down there.

I'm walking towards a cliff filled with something I've never felt or can even describe in a way I'm scared and worried as in the back of my mind something screams not to move any closer but I can't stop.

I keep moving, walking into the unknown hoping and wondering if George is walking beside me.

Kissing him felt so...heavenly. I thought I could never feel such emotions from a simple kiss but of course, I do because it's George.

He brings out a person I've never met, or maybe I haven't seen in a very long time.

I feel on fire when I kiss him. My body burned with emotions that I've never felt before. It clawed at me wanting, needing more of him.

I want to kiss him again. I want to keep that euphoric high where my thoughts are gone and all I can do is feel.

Kissing George gives you that impossible feeling of falling and flying all at once.

Just thinking about him makes my insides turn into pudding.

I'm taking slow and steady steps towards that cliff.

Somewhere deep in my subconscious mind, I hope that kissing George can also replace the venomous taste that he left also.

Kissing him felt like hell on earth, like every bone in my body was being constricted into stone while being burned in all the wrong ways.