State of Mind

Part One

When I was twenty one,  fresh out of a summer stint in rehab, barely hanging onto sobriety, and going back to university, I was having a lot of problems finding a job that paid the bills.

It seemed as though I'd gotten my life together, as if I'd finally grown up and decided to behave for once in my life, and all of this was very true.

However, my addiction had cost me everything. All my bridges were burned, even my own Mother refused to talk to me, and I had nothing. Waiting tables only went so far, and I now needed to figure out how to pay for my education as well as my basic finances.

So, when a girl I met at school had told me about this woman, a Madam, who hires escorts and pays them extremely well to sexually dominate men, I was immediately interested.

It seemed simple; get a client, take them to a hotel room to have kinky sex, and then get paid. As awful as it sounded, I also knew that not having any money to pay the rent would be even worse.

That's how I found myself walking down the side of the street one rainy, windy, miserable day in New York. As I tugged my black trench coat tighter around me, I realized I was soaked either way, and that my hair was now completely ruined.

I'd actually tried to look nice, considering looks was a fairly big part of this job, so I'd done my makeup and curled my hair, I'd even broken out one of my best dresses, but the rain seemed to be conspiring against me.

When I finally got to my destination after walking from the bus stop, I saw a sign on the old brick building that said 'Hidden Gems', a clever name for a place like this really. A jewelry store that was a front for the largest sex ring in the state.

Quite literally, Hidden Gems.

I opened the door, and immediately after entering the store I was blown away. The first thought that entered my mind was; damn, this looks expensive. The entire store was vintage-themed, and gave off 20's speakeasy vibes. It was absolutely breathtaking.

"Hi there. How can we help you today?" The cashier was a young woman, about the same age as I was asked me with a smile. Anyone with eyes would notice that this woman was beautiful, and her appearance perfectly fit the theme.

I'd never felt more out of place in my life.

"I'm, uh, I'm here to speak with Madam Robbins?" I ask, feeling shy all of a sudden. I'd come too far to back out, but in the corner of my mind I was thinking that I'd finally done it; I was in over my head.

The girls demeanour changed entirely; she smiled wickedly at me, and winked, before nodding her approval.

"Follow me" she opens the gate to lead me behind the counter, and I can practically feel my veins jumping under my skin in anticipation.

I didn't know what to expect; maybe an older woman, greying at least, who had been running this thing for years. I wasn't expecting anything else; I didn't want to look too surprised every time she said something.

"Miss Robbins will see you now"

Every single nerve in my body was on fire, and my intuition was telling me that maybe, just maybe, this wasn't a good idea.

But regardless, I continued onwards into the office of the Madam.

"And who might you be?"