Daughter of the Moon - Book Two: Earth

Chapter 18: Illness

- Elara -

The walk home from Lake Laogai was...interesting, to say the least.

Nobody talked, which would have been just fine if it had been just Zuko and I. But Iroh? We could hardly get that man to shut up. But there he was, as silent as a statue. Spirits, there was a good chance that he was not very happy with us, but whether he was lost in thought, angry, or (and I prayed to the Spirits that this was not the case) disappointed by our behavior...I had no idea.

To make matters worse, I could tell that something was seriously wrong with Zuko. At first, I had just assumed that he was exhausted after going more than a day without sleeping as part of our tracking efforts, but as we half stumbled into our new apartment, it was obvious that something else was up. And that worried me. A lot. So much so that I didn't even hear what Iroh was saying to us as he closed the door.

"Zuko, are you okay?" I whispered to the boy as he leaned into me, my smaller frame doing everything in its power to keep us both upright. "You seem weak."

I heard Zuko groan as he struggled to stand on his own, and it didn't take a firebending master to recognize that he was burning up. "I don't feel right," he strained to reply.

No sooner had those words passed his lips than he stumbled over his feet and teetered away from me, collapsing to the ground with a loud crash. I froze for a moment as I tried to comprehend what had just happened, but once I had regained my wits, I jumped into action.

I fell to the ground next to Zuko and rolled him onto his back, being careful not to place him on the small shards of the terra cotta pot he had shattered as he had tumbled to the floor. I found a small gash on his forehead where he must have hit the nearby end table, so I collected the discarded water from the pot and did my best to tend to his injuries. Thankfully, the cut healed almost immediately, so I instinctively went to try and figure out what had caused him to behave in such a way in the first place.

Unfortunately, I didn't get very far before Iroh reached out his hand to stop me. 

"Iroh! What are you doing?! Zuko needs my help!" I cried as my arms were pulled away from the sick boy before me.

"I know you have good intentions, Elara, but you mustn't give into the temptation to heal him," Iroh warned as he pushed me away (which was just a bucket of crap, if you were to ask me).

"It's not temptation, it's common sense!" I argued as I struggled (and failed) to scramble back to Zuko. "How can I allow him to suffer when I know there is something I can do to help?"

"You are too good for this world, Elara," Iroh mumbled to himself, doing nothing to cure my confusion. "However, I'm afraid that even if I allow you to heal Zuko, you wouldn't accomplish much."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I have a suspicion that this is no normal illness," Iroh informed me with an air of solemnity. "This is an illness of the mind—an illness of self-image, if you will. The decision Zuko made to free the Avatar's bison was in such conflict with the image he had of himself that he is now at war within himself about who he is."

I narrowed my gaze at the old man beside me as I tried to comprehend the crazy theory he had just offered to me. "Are you telling me that Zuko has made so many bad decisions that when he finally did something good, his body practically threw him into an angst coma?" I teased (although my question was fairly legitimate).

"I suppose that's one way to put it," Iroh sighed as I shook my head in disbelief.

"Of course you somehow managed to do that, stupid," I mumbled as I turned to Zuko and brushed away some of the hair that was already plastered to his face. I could tell that this was going to be rough considering how intense his symptoms seemed to be, and the thought of Zuko going through whatever the heck Iroh thought this was without any help simply made my heart ache. There had to be something I could do to make this better.

"Is there anything we can do to help?" I asked.

"All we can do is make sure that he's comfortable," Iroh answered, which was far from what I was hoping (although, it was exactly as I was expecting). "He's going to have to sweat this out."

"Of course," I answered sadly, and together Iroh and I moved Zuko to the next room where he would be forced to battle whatever inner demons were awaiting him.

- Zuko -

I shot up from my mat in a cold sweat, having been awaken by another awful nightmare, the taste of bile still lingering my mouth. The past few days had been a complete blur, the only notable events having been the vivid dreams that seemed to plague my feverish sleep.

My stomach churned as I remembered those visions—the dragons, my family, my past and the history of my country, Elara and her people, the Avatar—it was almost too much to bear. My only respite from the chaos were those brief moments of consciousness where I would finally get to see Elara in person (and Uncle too, of course). But even those moments were few and fleeting.

I rubbed my face in frustration as I felt the adrenalin begin to wear off and the fatigue begin to set in once again. I was sick and tired of...well...being sick and tired, but I knew that I was going to have to keep going like this until I figured some things out (at least, that was what Uncle had told me). Even though I wanted nothing more than to be healthy and to spend time with Elara again, I knew that my desires were just going to have to wait.

Before I returned to the mat, however, my attention was drawn by a deep sigh coming from somewhere next to me. I turned to see just the woman I was looking for sleeping on the cold, hard ground close to where I had been, likely having fallen asleep trying to take care of me. Her hair was knotted and scattered all over her face, her clothes were disheveled and dirty, and she looked absolutely exhausted. It killed me knowing that she was neglecting herself because she was taking care of me, but I knew that there was nothing I could do or say that would make her do anything different. There wasn't even the slightest doubt in my mind that Elara was an incredible woman, and the vision beside me was just the physical proof.

I felt a slight breeze flow in from the window as I studied my girlfriend, and I relished in the sweet relief it provided me from the heat of my fever. Unfortunately, the same chill that cared for me only seemed to torment Elara, and she began shivering almost immediately. I tried to pull myself over to the window to close it, but my body was too weak and sickly to stand upright. Spirits, I couldn't even sit upright without much difficulty, so it was clear that standing was simply out of the picture.

But I wasn't going to give up just yet. Since getting rid of the problem appeared to be out of the question, I scanned the room for something that could protect Elara from the cold. Eventually, my eyes landed on the blanket on my lap that someone had given me to help sweat this sickness out. Without hesitation I pulled the excess material over her to shield her from the wind. But that didn't seem to do much to stop her shivering.

I desperately tried to find something else to help her as the pull of sleep began to hang heavily on my body and my eyelids. Seeing how time was limited and Elara wasn't yet comfortable, I did the only thing a horribly sick and hormonal teenager could do.

I used the last of my strength to pull myself towards Elara, wrapping my arms around her so that maybe—just maybe—some of my warmth might chase the chill away. Much to my surprise, the moment I had embraced her, she inched even closer to me, leaning towards my warmth like a fire lily leaning towards the sun. Thanks to my quick (but foggy) thinking, Elara stopped shivering, and my prayer to be closer to Elara had been answered.

Just as I was about to drift off, I planted a gentle kiss on the top of her head. I knew right then and there that if there was one thing that I was sure of amongst the mess of ideas in my head, it was that I loved Elara and that I wanted to be with her as much as possible.

And with that on my mind, I allowed myself to slip into a dreamless sleep.

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A/N: Alright, I know this isn't my best work, but I'm a little rusty because I haven't been able to write in a while...oops. Regardless, I hope you enjoyed it, and I can't wait to see you in the next part!

Published: 26 December 2020