Stay (Hwasa)

MOONSUN

A/N: So inspired by our idol's performance at KBS Gayo Awards 2020! Congrats, my babies. It's Solar's selfless love for Moonbyul.

Solar's POV

I wake up in my bed, nearly noon after the celebration. The pounding headache reminds me of the revelry. I despise it. Why can't I handle alcohol like Wheein, Hyejin, or Byuli? Why do I pass out after just a can of beer or two shots of soju? Yeah, I'm a lousy drinker. No one invites me to go clubbing or for drinks after work because they know I'll just be a bother. I'll end up eating their food and then passing out.

Solar: "How did I come home last night?"

I mutter to myself, grabbing my phone and dialing Byul's number.

Ring, ring, ring.

Operator: "The number you dialed is out of coverage area. Please try again later. Beep, beep, beep..."

I hang up and decide to leave Byul a message.

Solar: "Byul-ah, gomawo (thank you) for sending me home. I know you'd never leave me behind. Do you have any plans tonight or during this hiatus? I want to travel. Wanna go with me?"

I send Byul a message, but she doesn't respond. Maybe she's still sleeping or with her family.

It's past 4 PM, and my stomach is growling. I get up, wash my face, brush my teeth, and change into comfy clothes: a loose t-shirt and shorts. I cook some home food—kimchi fried rice, omelet, teokbokki—as usual, my comfort food, and grab a soda. After eating, I clean my plates and tidy up my place. Finally, after two hours of cleaning here, there, and everywhere, I sit at my desk, open my laptop, and check some social media accounts and music charts. I'm such a busybody, sometimes overly obsessed, mostly just lousy.

Past midnight, I still can't sleep, maybe because I slept a lot last night. Staring at the ceiling, I remember to check if Byul read my message.

Solar: "Why hasn't she even read my message? What's wrong with Byul? It's not like her to ignore her phone. She's a gadget techie."

About to fall asleep, my phone rings.

Phone ringing...

Solar: "Hello? Byul-ah?"

Byul: "Solar? Sorry, I just read your... (hic) message... (hic)... Can I come to your house? (hic)"

I get worried, rushing to the door to find Byul sitting on the floor, wasted.

Solar: "Byul-ah? What happened? Why are you so drunk?"

Solar: Byul-ah????what happen?? Why are you so drunk?

Byul smiled at her as she helped her inside, guiding her to the couch. She fetched a glass of water for her.

Solar: "Here, drink some water."

(Solar was worried about Byul. She wasn't used to seeing her so drunk and wasted. She had a suspicion but couldn't confirm it to Byul. She knew Byul was infatuated with Hyejin. It all started during that acting season just to excite the fans, but lately, Solar felt that Byul secretly stared at Hyejin when she wasn't aware. She saw sparks in Byul's eyes whenever she talked to Hyejin or when they discussed her. Every time Solar noticed it, it tore her heart apart. Why was Byul looking far away when she was right beside her all the time? Maybe she was just a friend to Byul or an older sister she could rely on whenever she needed company. "Okay, I will be your light when the moon is covered by clouds," Solar thought.)

Byul lay down on the sofa. It really hurt. She just wanted to get wasted to forget. After confessing her feelings to Hyejin, she thought they were still okay. She forgot to give Hyejin the perfume she bought, it slipped her mind. She turned the car and went around when she saw Hyejin taking a cab. Out of curiosity, she followed Hyejin and saw her stop at Wheein's condo. The guard recognized her because they were all members. She followed Hyejin and confirmed it was Wheein's house. But to her surprise, Hyejin acted drunk in front of Wheein. It felt like betrayal. "Why did she say she liked me too when she's committed to Wheein already?" Byul punched the sofa, startling Solar.

Byul: "Bullshit!"

Solar: "Byul-ah, what's the matter with you?"

Byul got up and ran her fingers through her hair.

Byul: "Sorry, I didn't mean to do that. It's just that..." (Byul bowed and clenched her fist.)

Solar sat beside Byul, held her hand, and hugged her.

Solar: "It's okay not to be okay. You can tell me everything, even if it feels like I'm dying."

Byul hugged Solar tightly. To her surprise, Byul kissed her roughly, a rough kiss that made her feel suffocated. She tasted blood. "Why am I being punished? What did I do wrong?" She pushed Byul away, and her tears fell. Byul stopped kissing when she tasted the salty liquid. She saw Solar's face, tears streaming down it. Suddenly, it felt like she had been punched. "What have I done? All I can say is sorry and hug her tight... promise not to ever hurt you."

Solar stayed silent, unable to utter a word. She felt so stupid, so low. Was this her worth to Byul when Byul was her entire world?

A/N: That's all for now. Ah, so tired.