You Must Remember This

Chapter 22: Efficient Mouths And Inefficient Eyes

"Jason? Could we have a little chat?" Ms. Wolfe asked him during lunch as he ate noisily. She tried her hardest through her posture and expression to convey this wasn't premeditated, although of course it was. A new student in one of Jason's classes had complained that he patted her head as a form of greeting and did not quite buy the argument of historical precedent; she complained to her teacher, who thought it the right thing to do to tell Ms. Wolfe, and from there Ms. Wolfe thought she had better show a little leadership and take care of the problem. Jason felt his heart drop and his skin turn icy, and he knew his time was limited. He considered making a run for it—Ms. Wolfe was wearing high heels, she stood no chance—but that wouldn't be proper. He didn't know for certain he was in trouble, and in any case, he thought it best to face death with dignity.

Ms. Wolfe escorted Jason to Mr. Kurtz's door and told him to wait outside for a few minutes; she shut the door, and Jason tried his best to eavesdrop through the wall.

"So, Mr. Kurtz, this is about Jason. You know what I mean."

"What will the outcome be? A slap on the wrist or a disciplinary hearing?"

"What do you mean, Mr. Kurtz? We can't possibly decide beforehand."

"But he's a good kid, very well-behaved, and with this meeting being so impromptu we have had no time to build a case against him. So I do think whatever's the fastest outcome that gets us all back to lunch and ensures we don't have this happen again will be ideal."

"This is a serious matter, Patrick, not a game. If you were ever in my position you'd understand."

"It's just a bit of locker room talk—what's the harm? But anyway, bring him in." Ms. Wolfe knew that Jason was outside and could overhear, so she chose to hold her tongue and open the door. Jason walked in and took a seat, squirming a little when he felt their gazes on him.

"So, Jason," Mr. Kurtz began, "I think you know why we're here. I'll save you our side of the story and let you begin." Ms. Wolfe glared at him again, then Jason once more, but remained silent. Jason's first instinct was to redirect, claiming how his gestures were intended to be friendly and that nobody ever complained. He was equal-opportunity, patting members of all sorts of groups, a claim that sounded ridiculous but was really quite true; this, the principal claimed, did not make his behavior any less creepy. The accusations against Jason were first framed as sexual harassment, supplanted by relayed testimonials from many who felt uniquely targeted: others did not pat them on the head, certainly, and nobody they had talked to felt an inner sense of fuzziness or self-worth as a result of Jason's actions. Jason continued his attempts at redirection, arguing that even if it were harassment, it was mild, the sort of playground teasing where one kid stuck his tongue out at another kid and made a funny face, not the sort of harassment that demanded a tense conference that made his heart pound. It was fortunate for him that partially as a result of those mitigating factors, and that Jason was seemingly a good kid (albeit one with a strange penchant for outburst), that just like all the previous incidents, the only punishment was a strict warning not to do it again. He left the room silently, his head hung in shame, and spent the remainder of the period looking at happy children that all seemed to behave the same way without any sort of censure. If Juliet showed little hesitation toward brushing up against people, hugging them, or otherwise exhibiting a casual physical intimacy (which strangely enough, he thought, never seemed to be directed at him), and if Tom could give meaty handshakes to every acquaintance, and if Behrooz could give a back-pat and a smile, why was he now the pariah? It just wasn't fair.

"I didn't know you had this planned out beforehand," Mr. Kurtz remarked after Jason had left the room.

"Why wouldn't I? I have a duty to my students above all, and there's no room for assumption or prejudice here. You know what they say: when you assume, you make an ass out of 'you' and 'me.'" Ms. Wolfe, over the few years she'd been working at Heller, had learned that Mr. Kurtz operated under a slightly different ethical framework than would be usually encouraged. Mr. Kurtz believed that rules were a social construction meant only to make things take more time, and took time during staff meetings to indirectly criticize those like Ms. Foster who held onto such archaic customs. Likewise, Mr. Kurtz believed in personal experience above all, even more than any rules that were based on other people's experiences; after all, were they not all anecdotes? In this case, Mr. Kurtz knew Jason to be nothing but a gentleman, and whoever this transfer student was, how could they claim to understand Tiger values, how Tigers always did things? Jason certainly never dared to pat him on the head.