Matt: Bonjour, Justine. Voulez–vous coucher avec moi?
Justine: No, I don't want to sleep with you.
Matt: Is that what that means? Oh, man, I had a really gross tennis instructor.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
MatPat: That's not funny.
Nikita: I thought it was funny.
MatPat: You don't count. You started laughing in the middle of a funeral because you started thinking of a meme you saw on Facebook.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Safyia: Which way did they go?
MatPat: Well, based on the direction of the wind, the broken sticks in the corner, and the slight disturbance in the dirt, I'd guess they went left.
Safyia: You could really figure it out from that?
MatPat: No, you idiot, they sent me a text. See?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lele: I wasn't hurt that badly. The doctor said all my bleeding was internal. That's where the blood's supposed to be.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Justine: I find it very unseemly of Ro to start dating again. Isn't the customary period of mourning 10 years?
Tim: Die. Let's find out.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Oli: Where the devil is LeLe?
Matt: Well, it is raining outside... Maybe she melted?
Matt: Shall I look outside for a pointy hat?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Nikita: *Answers phone.* Hello?
Manny: It's Manny.
Nikita: What did he do this time?
Manny: No, it's me, Manny. It's actually me.
Nikita: What did you do this time?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ro: How do tall people people possibly sleep at night when the blanket can't possibly cover you?
DeStorm: Ro , it's four o'clock in the morning.
Ro: So, you can't sleep, huh? Is it because of the blanket?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Manny: Know why I called you in here?
MatPat: Because I accidentally sent you a dick pic.
Manny: *Stops pouring two glasses of wine.* Accidentally?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alex: We both look very handsome tonight.
DeStorm: You know, if you'd just said that I looked handsome, I would have said, "So do you."
Alex: I couldn't take that chance.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eva: What's wrong with you?
Matt: Off the top of my head, I'd say low self-esteem, a lack of paternal affection, and a genetic predisposition for anxiety and depression.
