GOLDEN-{SOOGYU}

FIVE

"Can't you go faster?" Beomgyu was shouting, clutching Soobin's waist tightly, the wind blowing their hair back as they raced on the road on Soobin's motorcycle.

"We're already at fifty-two," the ravenette replied, raising his voice.

After going back to Beomgyu's apartment to change, they were currently heading to the riverside park.

"Fifty-two isn't fast~ Don't tell me you're scared." Beomgyu suddenly said, smirking. "I bet you're scared that your mom will be mad, don't you?"

"Shut up."

"Aww, little Soobinie's scared~"

Soobin looked back towards the boy. He knew he was trying to make him go faster but then, it wouldn't hurt to do that once.

"Don't regret it."

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"That. Was. Amazing!"

Beomgyu's face was red from the frosty wind as he took off his helmet, his hair sticking up in weird directions, but he was smiling the biggest smile ever, eyes gleaming.

"Still think I'm scared?" Soobin smiled back, locking the motorcycle and parking it by a tree.

"You're the best, gosh," the boy combed his hair back into its original state, "That was so, so amazing."

"I know, right? I'm the best at racing."

It was the loosest, freest, and lightest Soobin had ever felt in a long time.

It feels like something that was clogging his throat had been removed.

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"I wonder why people say their eyebrows are knitting. I mean, imagine brown, bushy eyebrows holding wooden sticks!"

"I guess they mean their eyebrows look like knitting sticks," Soobin replies with a smile, "but they don't look alike, to be honest."

They were currently sitting by the frozen river, holding to-go cups of hot chocolate, talking about.... nonsense, really, but it feels nice and warm.

"Oh, and how people describe their eyes as 'orbs'. They say... for example, 'a blablabla sight welcomes his brown orbs'. What is that supposed to mean? If you think of it as an eyeball, it's more white than brown, right?" Beomgyu muttered, taking another sip from his cup.

"But if you don't think of it as the entire eyeball and only see the part showing, I think the brown is a little bit bigger," Soobin said after some thought, "But I'm not sure."

Beomgyu suddenly scooted over, resting his head on the older's shoulder. "It seems like we're never sure of anything."

He turned in Soobin's direction and smiled. "Can I tell you something?"

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I was raised by my grandma, far away from my parents because they were busy working. At least that's what they say.

I remembered them as Santa, Mr. and Mrs. Claus because all they did was visit on Christmas day and bring gifts.

I lived happily with Grandma. She was a cool lady, old but still youthful and fun. She taught me how to do makeup, and would take me to the mall and we'd marvel at the pretty things there on the display.

She also owned an antique store. She's like-- the new and the old all glamorously mixed together.

She said we live to love, to look at pretty things, and feel happy.

I loved her.

But she left. She died when I was six.

I moved back to my parent's house.

I remember it was a winter just like this one, and I thought I was moving to the North pole because it was so cold.

They stopped giving me gifts. Instead, they gave me textbooks and dictionaries.

I stopped believing in Santa not long after that, and I would try my best to make Mum and Dad happy. I studied and I had good grades, but they only saw how I lost one point here, another point there.

If I got a 99, they'd ask "Where did the 1 go? Work harder next time."

If I got 100, they'd say of course I have to get 100.

If I didn't get 100, they hit me on the palm, as teachers do 50 years ago.

I thought life was meaningless.

The people I loved left.

My life was just test after test. Exam after Exam. The hell I have to go through repeats itself every single damn time.

It was makeup that kept me alive. I learned how to do it so subtly nobody will notice. I post pictures of my work on Instagram with a fake name so nobody I know will possibly know.

But they still found out, and they took away all my supplies.

They refused to talk to me because I need to "focus on my studies". They say they'll deal with me after the college entrance examination.

So I left. And I came here because it's supposedly the "gay" part of the city.

I thought there would be so many weird things I don't seem weird anymore.

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"And that's my story," Beomgyu said, blinking forcefully, "I was going to tell you sooner or later. So I decided on sooner."

"I'll be here," Soobin said after some silence. "If you need to rant about anything, I'm here."

"Are we friends then?" the blond-haired boy said, taking another sip from his cup.

"Yes."

And it was sure, they both knew, even though they're never sure of anything.

It was a comfortable weight, something undeniable.

It feels like something that would stay no matter what happens.

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I feel like i need to update lol

happy new year guys! also if anyone is into yeongyu, i wrote a little new year oneshot and you can check it out!