The Chaotic Mess Called the Puppy Pack (Puppy Pack TW)

Pressure of Perfection

Mason's pushed aside anxiety

Mason anxiously tapped his foot, staring at his computer screen. He's rewritten the essay on his screen six times. It just wasn't right, this wasn't him. He was about ready to hit delete again when he felt a hand touch his shoulder. The boy jumped as he almost fell over.

Corey caught him, "hey, it's me."

"You could have said something," Mason faked a smile.

"I did, but you ignored me."

"Oh, I'm just writing this essay for English."

"For 10 hours? It's a five-page paper," Corey questioned him.

"I have to get it right; I'm going to rewrite it."

"No, you're not," Corey slammed the laptop shut, "we are going to go out to eat."

"Corey, I can't I have to finish this."

"It's done; I've read it and the past five ones you already had done. They were all perfect."

"How long have you been in my room?"

"All day," Corey stated, "I've literally been sitting on your bed for the whole day. You know that; every time I said something you answered with mhmm."

"Well, it's still not right."

"Well, I'm hungry let's go."

"I'm not going Corey; you know where the kitchen is."

"And you and I are going out."

"Corey, I can't!" Mason finally screamed at him, returning to his desk chair.

"Mason, are you okay?" He never snapped at Corey.

"I'm fine; I just need to finish this."

"It's twenty-five points; you are fine."

"I'm not fine," Mason stared at him, "just let me finish."

"What would happen if you just left it as it is?"

"I would fail."

"You would not, and you know that."

"You don't know that!"

"Mason, calm down."

"I just need to," Mason said fighting back tears of frustration.

"Hey, look at me; one essay isn't going to make any difference for you."

"What if it does," Mason said, tears coming down his face.

"Do you do this with every assignment?" Corey asked hugging him.

"Sometimes," Mason nodded, trying to compose himself, "I just have to make it perfect."

"You need to relax."

"I can't Corey!"

"Come on, you'll feel better if we take a break."

"I'm not taking a break," Mason repeated himself.

"Please, Mas."

Mason sighed, "Okay."

Corey dragged him downstairs and out the door; he grabbed Mason's keys and climbed in the driver's seat.

Mason reluctantly climbed into the passenger seat.

"Mason," Corey looked over at him his hands shaking.

"I'm sorry; I just can't," Mason looked down.

"Hey, it's okay," Corey grabbed his hand, "take a minute."

Mason calmed himself down and looked at Corey, "sorry you had to deal with this."

"You know I am here for you always; if you want to talk about it you can."

"Everyone expects me to have the best grades, the perfect work, sometimes I just can't handle it."

Corey thought about it no one ever asked how Mason was; he was always perfect. He was a genius, always carried the team, set up the plans. He never thought about how much anxiety Mason withheld inside of him. He looked over at his boyfriend, fighting back tears. He wished he noticed earlier; he would have tried to comfort him.

"I'm sorry, Mason; I didn't realize how much pressure you had on yourself."

'It's okay; I shouldn't worry about it."

"It matters; what you feel does matter."

Mason nodded taking in a deep breath, "thank you."

"I know you can't control it, but I am here when you get overwhelmed."

Mason nodded, "I know you are; I just wished I didn't have to overthink everything."

"It's not you; it's just how your brain works. It's okay, just sometimes you need to let it out."

"Thanks," Mason smiled, "I love you, really you're the best person I could have ever asked for."

"I love you too," Corey leaned over and kissed him.