Flooded Waters

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟐𝟒

Alina balled up her fists, placing her shaky hands in her jean pockets. She slowly made her way to Mrs. Mendoza's office -- her therapist at school. The tapping of her shoes against the tile floor was the only thing echoing the empty hallways. All the students were at lunch while Alina was on her way to talk to her therapist.

Her breaths were shaky and uneven, but Alina continued on strolling to the room she knew very well. She had been in Mrs. Mendoza's office many times since she had started highschool. Ever since the accident she had had so many therapists, jumping from one to another. None of them fit her until she found Mrs. Mendoza. She had now gone to her for three years.

Mrs. Mendoza was always so sweet, with a welcome smile playing on her lips and an understanding manner. She always listened to Alina no matter what. Alina would go on for hours if she wanted to, but she always had to go to class after forty minutes.

Taking a deep breath, Alina opened the door with the name plate Mrs. Mendoza's office: School Therapist. The door squeaked slightly and caught the attention of a lady sitting behind a desk and busy taking care of papers.

She looked up, a smile stretching on her lips when her eyes fell on Alina. Her midnight brown hair was wavy and cut super short. She was cool that way because Mrs. Mendoza hated having long hair. She liked to cut it like a boy-cut, but it was still super stylish for her.

The room was cluttered with papers and things everywhere, but yet it was stylish. Fairy lights hung on the walls and her curtains were colorful, a vivid pop of yellow. She had floral pillows resting on the leather chairs and her walls were covered in posters and framed pictures. It reminded Alina of a teenager's room, kind of like hers.

Alina's room was homey, with led lights lighting up her room and her white wall was practically covered with posters of bands and other things. She had her art supplies pushed into one corner, paint splattering everywhere. A big rug covered her wooden floor and she had a big bed. Alina wished she could just be home and sleep, but she was stuck in her therapist's office. She had a window facing where the sun rose so the sun rays would fill her room in the morning. They danced on the reflection of her mirror and the curtains blew slightly in the window when she opened her window.

"Alina!" She exclaimed, waving Alina to come in. Alina exchanged an uneasy smile and took a seat in one of her chairs facing her behind the desk. Mrs. Mendoza pushed her papers and folders to the side, enveloping her hands together and resting them on the table.

Alina gazed down at her shoes in embarrassment. Even if she knew she could trust her therapist, her anxiety got the best of her sometimes. The guy on her shoulder would whisper things to her like she can't talk to her because otherwise she will laugh, etc. The dictator was what Alina had named him. He was an ugly goblin, popping up on her shoulder and mixed with her mind. Usually, she would listen and she didn't like that.

"How are you, dear?" Mrs. Mendoza's cool and sweet voice spoke softly. Alina lifted her head to see her therapist's smiling face. She had a pen in her hand, like per usual, ready to take notes.

Alina bit her lip, fumbling with her hands in her lap. She bounced her knee up and down. "I'm- I don't know," Alina sighed. She didn't know how she was feeling these days. She felt everything, anger, sadness, happiness, fear, but she still couldn't pinpoint what she was feeling. Ever since Mabel ditched her and secrets about her so called "friends" bullying Mabel and everything in between, Alina felt like her life was spiraling. She was out of control, feeling the same way she did the months after the ocean nearly claimed her.

Mrs. Mendoza tilted her head in confusion. "Care to elaborate?"

Alina pushed back tears, but one managed to slip past and rolled down her cheeks. She wiped it away quickly. "I feel everything, sadness, anger, happiness, fear all at the same time yet I can't pinpoint what I'm exactly feeling."