Raspberry cake「Hanji x reader」✔

5.

|||Y/n L/n|||

I was curious about what they said. What where they going to say actually? This bothered my mind for what do I not know how long. I kept my ears at the conversation. "I'm going on a expedition." They cleared. But for me my head made out messy scenarios.

I was shocked at what they said. I dropped almost my cup of tea. The pieces of the cup that would've laid down there with the hot liquid spreading slowly over the ground.

I couldn't find my way to look them directly in the eyes. "I just wanted to see you, to tell you that. Because if I wouldn't, I would never find any peace." My eyes widened at their confirmation they could die. They went through that many other expeditions.

Why just now? So many questions were bothering me. Not letting myself in peace at the moment. Which I literally hated once about me.

I was in aware that they were a Survey Corps Soldier. The risk of them dying, but why did this hit me so hard? I set my tea cup down onto the small plate. I blinked with my eyes while my eyelashes grazed right on my skin gently.

Which tackled a bit, I opened my eyes shot up open. I cleared my throat quiet before mumbling something under my breath. "That means.. your saying goodbye?"

"Maybe~" they sang. I only lowered my head slightly unnoticed by them. The glance that belonged to my eyes was rather fixated on the ground. That was nothing I could joke about right now. My tongue was feeling toed by the situation. I flinched my teeth together as I shot out out of my thoughts.

I felt hurt and we continued talking about different, but that wasn't the same. Not today, not tomorrow only with the time it would might change what I didn't even thought of at that time. I opened the Door, they went slowly out of there. "You come to say goodbye, tomorrow?" their gaze softened on me.

I had felt that somehow. I didnt looked them directly into the eyes, "mhm yeah.. sure."

I watched them until they faded out of my sight. The dark surrounded the figure slowly. I put the dishes away and cleaned them. My thoughts were bothering me as much as ever when I was overthinking. I sighed at the situation.

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On the coming day as I woke up I looked in the mirror. I pursed my lips and smiled which felt soon into a sad smile. I dressed myself up underlining myself with the apron. I went down into the cafe where I started sweeping.

I didn't even thought about going out. That wasn't in the slightest in my mind. Though my mind was full of fuzzy things there was one thing I focused on. I wouldn't go outside cause it would only hurt more.

I touched the glass of the door and leaned with my back against it. I let a big sigh escape my lips. Fading into a peaceful atmosphere.

Soon I heard loud cheering and out of distance the horses clappering with their hooves. The crowds were standing close to close. Now they cheered, but later they would return unfriendly glares and rude comments. They would role of their tongues like the easiest thing in the world.I didn't felt like leaving the place.

Either way I had mo reason
to do so. I wasn't mad at them I was dissapointed that they didn't told me earlier. Even though we were just two people who met almost 1½ months ago, there was a chance we could have changed our relationship. We could have turned into friends maybe.

At least were those things bothering me badly. After customer by customer went in, ordered something, thanked me sometimes and left I let out a sigh. It was no wonder for me that a day was so full of work.

I observed the streets in the late hours out of my cafe. The windows were mirroring my reflection. I hugged my knees and let my head fall into them. I closed my eyes and let the time pass by. I allowed myself to take a break.

After a while I got up. My body recovered from the hard ground. I saw the sunset which horrified me just in the next moment. My eyes were wide from the image infront of me.

I saw bloodied figures of man and women, also everything between it. My eyes immadient searched through the crowds after a certain brunette with goggles. I didn't found them, it was hopeless. I led my eyes slide of the big amount of people.

I opened the door immediately and let it open up stay how it was. I runned through the crowds as much as I could. I apologized myself at them every time I hit someone with myself. Until I met a man with hazel brown hair what I guessed. His eyes full of guilt.

I called out, "Sir, excuse me?" my voice was sounding nuzzled through all the crowds. He turned his attention on me. My voice broke before I could say anything.

"Are you miss. L/n?" he questioned suddenly. His hands had tightened around the reigns of the horse. That was something he couldn't let slide off under the table. The unkown bad feeling that whelmed around me was mirroring in his facial expression. He spoke for decades without forming a word.

About all of that what happened. I started feeling unsure since this. My mind still questioned myself with bothering questions. My bad intuition about it was a sort of personal problem. Always thinking first of the worst.

"Section Commander Hanji.." he trailed off. He managed to let me thing of the thoughts I had before being true. More and more which made me feel restless.

"They got into a accident." he ended the sentence to my shock. My blood froze as he said that. My eyes widened and I couldn't give believe in his words.