Surprised Bride

It is okay

Alex P.O.V

I really want to try to work this out with Megan now since Avery herself has given the green signal for me. I don't know why but it is like I am addicted to Megan's lips. I never wanted to stop kissing her but I also don't want to take advantage of her just because I know that she loves me. 

I want to do it with her when both of us are ready and on the same page. 

Right now my mind is in a mess. And I don't want to take her peace away with my mixed signals. 

I brought her out on a date with me after the whole intense make-out session.

Woah, that was a super hot make-out session

I brought her to the lake that I usually go to when I need some peace and time to just sit and think.  It was very special to me. I used to come here often after Avery's passing. 

If I brought Megan here, then she really is a special person to me, cause I never told or brought anyone here before but on the other hand, I am not close to many people so maybe I am just always a lonely person. 

"Alex", I turned to look at her.

 "What changed?" Megan's question took me out by surprise.

"What do you mean, Megan? You don't like this place?" I asked a bit worried that I may have ruined this date. 

"No, I mean what made you think about us dating? Cause the last I remembered when I told you how I felt, you literally went M-I-A on me", she said reminding me of the first time I shut her out of my life completely. 

I sighed heavily before trying to explain all of this to her.

"Megan", grabbing her wrist in mine "I don't know if you would believe me or even try to understand this, it is a bit complicated but this is what I believe", she gave me an encouraging smile and stroked my hand with her thumb to keep me going. 

"Well, David had a chat with me yesterday at the Firm's cafe about our...us", she knew what I was referring to which means David already told her about our conversation. 

"I did get mad at him for pushing you like that, I apologize for him but he was just being a Dad at the moment. I'm sorry Alex", she apologized on behalf of David and I cut her short. 

"That was not the issue but that does lead to what I am about to say," I said hesitating a bit. 

"Go on, you can tell me anything" I smiled gratefully thanking her for this. 

"After the chat with David, I went to Avery's grave. I...ahh... I was telling her how much I missed her and that how difficult it is without her..", I stopped midsentence to see if I had hurt Meg by talking about Ave, but she doesn't seem to be fazed about that so I continued

"I went on and on was crying, heaving, and just completely vulnerable. I cried myself to sleep, it was also pouring cats and dogs by then and I was soaked but I didn't care, I just wanted to spend the night there with her and..a...s...asked her to take me with her that night", I looked down not able to see her and say those words to her face. 

She lifts my chin to face her and said, "I understand why you would say that but that doesn't mean I'm not hurt hearing that from you Alex, I hope you would never think about that here on with me by your side", I nodded and promised her I won't. 

I continued, "When I slept the night there I had a very vivid dream of Avery in it. I am still unsure if she really came to speak to me or that I was just dreaming of her. She told me to let her go and to try to work things out with you. She told me that even if she had handpicked someone for me, she couldn't have found someone as perfect as you. She said that you will make me happy and that would make her happy. She also said that you love me more in the past 6 months than she has ever done."

Megan went quiet hearing this. She was probably taking some time digesting this. I took a lot of time too. 

I took her hands in mine making her look at me and said, "Avery may have convinced me in a way to try this out with you, but that is not the only reason why I am here."

I sighed, bringing myself closer to her, "I do like you Megan, I have said that before, but I was holding back because I felt guilty. I thought by being with you, I would have betrayed Avery's trust and love", she seemed to understand where I was coming from. 

"But, I realized from the dream that she actually wants me to be happy, and that would make her happy. I failed to understand that before, but I do now. I want to take things slow with you. Is that okay with you Megan?" she took her hands away from mine and was deeply thinking, her eyebrows furrowed.

I was kinda panicking at the moment. I mean I am not in love with her, NOT YET,  but I could see my future with her in it, that has to mean something, right?

She faced me again after some time and sat closer now, "Alex, I am okay with anything you want to do, but I need you to promise me one thing." 

"Sure, what is it, Megan?" 

"If at any point in time, you realize that you're doing this only to make Avery happy or that you realize you can never love me back, please be honest and let me know, I don't think I could ever live myself knowing that you're in this with me not because you want this." 

"I promise to be as transparent and honest with you Megan." She smiled and couldn't stop myself from pulling her for a kiss. 

After the kiss, she said, "I didn't know you like to kiss me this much." I laughed at that and brought her closer to me before whispering in her ear, "I am just addicted to the taste of your lips and can't stop thinking of tasting them after yesterday's first session", her cheeks were redder than a tomato now. 

"And, if we are being super honest now, I have another thing to confess", I said making her scrunch her eyes. 

"Another reason as to why I kind of thought about marriage is because David told me yesterday that if I don't marry you then he is going to find someone else. Just the thought of you being in another's arms made me angry cause I will admit, I was jealous." I pouted at the confession.

She giggled and pinched my cheeks before saying, "You're such a charmer. I am glad to hear you were jealous but trust me, there is nothing for you to be jealous of. I only love you."

I pushed a strand of her hair behind her ears, kissed her temple, and brought her closer into a side hug, sniffing her hair, they always smelled like vanilla.