i know, you know, we know

Chapter 1

Lisa learns to love in little things and small moments.

She loves Jisoo by letting her talk about the games she plays, by staying up all night watching her murder her controllers, by learning how to cook chicken for when she's sad and lonely and too strong to ask for comfort. She loves Chaeyoung by letting her drag her in and out of shopping malls, by sending her photos of the sunset when she feels lost and confused, by telling her that her music deserves to be heard when she struggles to write her songs.

Lisa loves Jennie differently. She still does so in little things and small moments, but Lisa doesn't only learn how to love quietly – she also learns how to hide it. It's fear, she knows. After all, she could only stand by and watch as the world turned against Jennie for trying to find love where she could, watched as the aftermath left Jennie terrified and heartbroken, watched as the world tore into a woman Lisa knew was nothing but kind for trying to find a sense of normalcy. And Lisa didn't know why she felt like she should hide what she feels for Jennie even before the sky fell for the woman, but she does, and she does it well.

Maybe that's why it was such a shock for her when the people around her began to take notice.

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The first to say anything about it was her mother.

Earlier that day, Lisa had taken it upon herself to show Jennie around her homeland. And Lisa doesn't always let people in – a byproduct of how her biological father decided that she and her mother weren't enough for him, she supposes. But for the day, she was determined to show Jennie the life she's lived thus far.

She ripped herself open and took down her walls for Jennie.

Lisa brought her to her old school and pointed out an alley a few blocks away where she would always climb the fire escape all the way to the rooftop when she felt overwhelmed.

(Jennie slipped a hand around the crook of her elbow like she was trying to pull her back when Lisa told her that sometimes, she wished she could fly away from everything that made life a little less worth it.)

She brought Jennie to a café near her house and told her about the time she sat where they were sitting and broke a poor boy's heart. She blushed in embarrassment throughout the story but enjoyed how Jennie laughed at her expense, eyes bright and smile wide.

(Jennie sobered and sipped daintily from her coffee cup, linking their pinkies together, when Lisa told her that she hated that she had to do it, that she didn't want to be someone who broke hearts.)

She brought her to a local park, produced sandwiches and drinks from her backpack, and told Jennie to sit down beside her and under the shade of a tree farthest from the entrance. As they watched kids and parents soak up the sun, Lisa told Jennie that her mother found her in this park, curled up against this tree, a day after her biological father left them. She had been too young to understand but old enough to be hurt. She was naïve, and she believed that if she waited at the park long enough, her father would come for her the way he used to. When it was her mother who found her, Lisa told Jennie that that was the loudest she'd ever cried and that she and her mother stayed in the park until dark, waiting for someone who would never come for them.

(Jennie looked as if she might cry as she put her half-eaten sandwich down, scooted close to Lisa, laid her head on her shoulder, and wrapped an arm around her trembling body.)

Lisa hums, content and comforted by Jennie's warmth.

"Maybe if that me had you, she wouldn't have been so sad," Lisa whispers as she shifts to wrap an arm around Jennie's shoulder, pulling her closer.