Hospital for Souls

Chapter 14

All I can think about is my life. I see it flashing before my eyes. Everything from the moment I was born until now, I can clearly see. Life really was horrible for me, but somehow I've managed to get this far, and now as far as I've gotten in staying alive, it soon will be taken away from me. I never went out for help even in the worst of my times, but when I finally do it'll eventually end up being the death of me. Life is never fair, and life just sucks. Why even live it if we're all going to go to Hell anyways?

My life continues to flash before my eyes, all the good and bad moments of my life. Once I see the moment I'm living in right now, I look down at my arm to see the blood dripping out of it and spilling to the floor. I sliced my arm, but a little bit deeper than I was planning to, and now the blood flows freely out of my arm. I was simply doing as Alyssa told me to do, don't let them make me happy and to keep on cutting, but I guess I over did it this time. This is the moment where I can actually die and really go to Hell. If I do live out of this moment, I know that I can't let people ever help me again or even let them inside of my mind. Help just doesn't seem to make anything better, only worse, and help is what causes more heartbreak along with being the death of me in the end.

The blood keeps pouring out of my arm fast. I don't want to die, but I'm just trying out a little experiment. Let's see if they really want to save me, or if they're just going to let me die instead.

A good amount of my blood is spilling onto the floor. I feel myself beginning to black out of the world. They won't save me. They won't save me. They're not going to save me. I don't matter to them at all. I won't exist. I won't exist. I won't exist....

With all of these thoughts going through my head, I fall to the bathroom floor, directly in the pool of my blood, and black out from the world.

Within a few quick seconds, I see myself in a hospital. I'm lying down on a bed and doctors are moving the bed fairly quickly.

"She's lost a lot of blood." A female voice says with panic. "We need to save her. Move it!" My bed begins to move faster, and I feel myself in a daze. I hear lots of loud voices and see a crowd of people around me. They all look frantic, like they're in a rush, but why? As the thoughts go through my head, I hear a loud bang as my bed goes through two giant swinging doors. Only three doctors are around me now, not a crowd like there was only moments ago. It's a lot quieter than wherever I was in this hospital before. I try to look around at the room, but I have no energy to get myself up. I then see the three doctors over me, talking in very frantic voices.

"We need to sedate her." It was a male doctor. 

"We can't do that!" It was another female voice. "You know we can't! We'll-"

"Shut up Christine!" I see above me a male doctor sticking a needle in some sort of bottle. "This girl has lost a lot of blood and if we don't sedate her she's going to be in a lot of pain and we could lose her. This is the only way." All three of the doctors look down on me. I look directly into the male doctor's eyes. They're very green, and through the blue outfit he's wearing, I see some brown hair. He then takes his hand and moves my hair perfectly off of my face, and then strokes my cheek.

"Everything will be perfectly okay Raven. You just need to relax." With that, he sticks the needle into my arm and I fall asleep. 

For once, I am actually asleep. I really am dreaming. I am no longer in the hospital for souls, but I am actually having a dream. Instantly a strong calmness comes over me and I feel control. I truly feel some peace, like I can do whatever I want to. I look around the dream, noticing that I'm in a meadow with hills. There's butterflies flapping their wings and flowers of all sorts of colors. A cool breeze begins to blow and a sunset forms right in front of my eyes. I take a deep breath, and then enjoy the precious moment. I feel a huge weight lifted off of me and I feel free. As free as I feel, it makes me begin to think. What if I still am in the Hospital for Souls? The only way to find out is if I can control this dream, and if it can become a nightmare. At the Hospital for Souls, no nightmares can happen. Yet again, I also feel awake there where here I feel like it is all just a dream and I really am sleeping. There's only one way to find out.