Bittersweet

~~ Cold Light of Day ~~

~~ Jenna ~~

"Waaaake up, Mommy."  A nudge to my ribs.

Head pounding, mind empty, I woke up faster than a cat in ice-water.  Where was I?  My eyes flung wide and after a second a two my head turned like a Halloween dummy. 

I remembered.

Prizing my tongue from the roof of my mouth. "M-Mommy's awake, Angel." Raising my hand to cover my eyes from the brightness of the room, my throat burned with dryness.

"Mommy, mommy, look, I'm dressed! Aunty Janelle 'elped me, but I did all the buttons."

Lowering my hand, I raised my head from the pillow.  "Y-you look beautiful, Angel, and you're a big girl fastening all your buttons.  Mommy's so proud of you." I barely recognized my own voice as a familiar one interrupted.

"Hey, I told you not to disturb your mommy, you little monster..." Janelle, my best friend walked towards us both before bending to tickle Ava.  Standing straight, her eyes settled on me, assessing me, obviously looking for signs of crazy. "Morning hon, you okay?"

Was I okay?  Hell no!  "Yeah, I'm fine."

She raised an eyebrow, giving me a look.  "A-hu," she huffed.  I never could lie to her.

"C'mon let's drop you off next door, Claire-bear and Charlie are waiting to play." 

Ava launched herself on top of me, swiftly pulling back, wrinkling her nose in disgust. "Ewe... you smell bad, Mommy." 

Urgh, that would be dried vomit in my hair, no doubt. "Well, I'll smell good by the time you get back, yes?" I reached and grabbed her little nose to hear the beautiful sound of her giggling.

Her giggles halted; mouth suddenly downturned. "Are you still sad Mommy?" 

My stomach plummeted; no doubt she must have seen the sorry state I was in yesterday. "No Angel, Mommy's not sad.  And I'm sorry you had to see me upset, I lost my bag yesterday."  She tilted her head, looking at me with a thoughtful expression.  Thankfully, Janelle intervened again.

"C'mon, I'll race you," challenged Janelle. "One...go!"

"Bye, Mommy." Ava jumped from the bed and chased after her.

As they exited the bedroom, yesterday filtered through my thoughts, but I honestly couldn't remember the drive home, or how I got into bed.  My woolly tongue and banging head was however, a stark reminder I'd stuck to the plan of drowning in red wine—to rid me of the unwanted images of my shitty husband and my replacement.

A few minutes later, Janelle returned with both hands filled with a welcome sight.

I sat up, pushing up against the headboard as she handed me a glass of water and some painkillers.  "You're a mind reader." I smiled weakly.