Love Don't Change • Chris Brown

Deceit

6:42AM

Yasmin slowed in front of my car parked at Crenshaw Square and locked the door before I could get out. I looked at her in confusion.

"Riley... talk to me, you sure you're okay?" Yasmin asked genuinely concerned. I smiled and nodded. She refused to mirror my smile obviously not buying my lie. "You were quiet all morning and the whole way here, you won't stop shaking, and look... now you're crying. What happened? Is it something I did?"

I quickly wiped away the tears I subconsciously let fall. "Yasmin I'm not okay, but I can't sit here and explain why I'm not. Thank you for the ride, have fun at your shoot." Without giving her the chance to utter another word I transferred myself and my belongings from her car to mine. The entire ride back home was silence and blinking to clear my blurry eyes.

I feel sick.

Cold.

Cruel.

And all around dumb.

I'm so fucking dumb.

God how could I be so stupid?

I dreaded the commute from my car to our door and my head felt like it got ten pounds heavier the closer I got. I shut and locked the door behind me, meeting up with India sound asleep on the couch. I wiped my nose with my sleeve as I edged the door open. The second I saw Christopher's sleeping face I couldn't hold it in. I broke down. I'm weak. All I can do is cry. I let my body drag to the floor and let the tears flow.

"Ry... what the f— baby what's wrong? You good? You hurt? What the fuck is wrong with you?" Chris touched all over my body to check for wounds. I moved his hands quickly. He continued to throw questions at me and I couldn't say a word. Just tears. "Riley you scaring me, why the fuck you crying like this baby?"

"I'm so sorry," I managed to utter between sobs. "Baby I'm so sorry don't hate me."

"Riley why would I hate you?" Chris lifted my face up with his hand so my eyes met his. I quickly looked away. "Riley why the fuck would I hate you, you need to talk to me."

"Chris I'm so sorry I swear to God it was a mistake."

Christopher finally seized his questions and sat next to me on the floor, holding me in his arms. "Riley please calm down and tell me what you talking 'bout."

I wiped my eyes and nose and cleared my throat the best I could.

11:43pm

"Here," Yasmin handed me a bowl of her pozolé. "I promise I can cook."

"You're annoying." I said taking the bowl from her. After a small grace she sat next to me on the couch and ate while we finished up the Netflix movie. Ten minutes into my lovely bowl of soup and virgin cocktail Keith walked out of his room in just sweatpants and slides, obviously wanting me to thirst over him.

"You could've told me the food was ready." He said heading for the kitchen. I turned my attention back on the TV and finished my meal. Keith made his plate and joined us in the living room, causing me to stand up. He snickered and sipped his soup. "So you don't fuck with me for real?"

"I'm about to see how far he is." I ignored his question and headed toward the kitchen to place my dishes in the sink. I sat on the island and called Chris. I could tell he barely wanted me here, so I honestly expected him to be waiting outside; it's been almost thirty minutes and he hasn't replied to my text.

"At the tone, please reco—" I sucked my teeth and hung up the phone, calling two more times. When those two went to voicemail that's when I presumed him asleep. Yasmin met me in the kitchen with her dirty dishes. "How far is he?"