Honestly, I never wanted to make a scene, even if it wasn't a big one, because something in my gut told me it wasn't her - that I was a terrible person for even making Pony think that it might have been. But then, a slight part of me was completely convinced that it was and I didn't care if it meant asking her a million stupid questions, or making her thinking badly of me, I just wanted to know.
We had finished eating, neither Randy nor Lilly had come down and Stacy had just left to wash up.
"You know you can't fit six people in a car, right?" I pestered, just after Stacy was out of ear shot. "You can hardly fit five in most of them."
Isla's eyes narrowed as she watched me. "Yeah, and..?"
"So," I interrupted, "how could you have three brothers, a daughter and two parents in a car?"
She took a while to answer, before saying. "If this is me you're talking about, I wasn't in the car."
"Really?"
She nodded, sharply, but my tone made her rethink. "I don't remember being in a crash."
I looked down at the salad I had barely touched and then back at her. "Do you remember being in hospital?"
When she nodded, she lifted up her arm where a long scar ran from the top to the bottom of her wrist. "I fell down the stairs, a few years ago. The glass slit my arm open, that's what Stacy said anyway."
She lent back in her chair, crossing both her arms and legs.
"Is their anything that you can remember. Something that hasn't come directly from Stacy?" I asked, looking at the scar and wondering how much convincing it would have taken for Stacy to hide a whole car crash.
"Names." She took a slow breath. "Faces, sometimes, but its foggy and our house."
I could almost hear the water stop running in the kitchen and the banging of pots had halted. Stacy had finished.
"What were their names?" I answered, hurrying the conversation along. At first I wanted some kind of information to point me in the direction that she wasn't their sister, but I needed the names.
"You're going to laugh. Their names were weird," a smile spread across her face as I put my hands up in surrender.
"I promise I won't."
As her eyes directed towards the ground, she said something, voice soft and quiet and all I could hear were the footsteps of Stacy from down the hall.
I hummed so she would repeat it and leant down towards her.
"The older one was called Forest, and then there were the twins Teeman and---"
I lifted my head back up, my heart sinking into my stomach as it knotted and suddenly, I felt the urge to vomit.
"What?" She stopped talking as I got up, abruptly, looking for an excuse to leave.
"Where's your phone?"
Her eyes narrowed at my husky tone. "Are you okay?"
Forcing out a nod, I just grimaced. "Your phone?"
"Down the hall." She cleared her throat and I felt her eyes on my back as I stumbled out the room.
I never got to the phone. I never dialled the Curtis' number like I was going to, I just ran straight to the bathroom to throw up the few salad leaves that I had picked at.
"Hey," there was a small tap at the door and Randy's voice travelled through it, "I wanna go, you wanna go?"
Unlocking the door, I came face to face with my brother. My glassy eyed brother, that I know was only trying to stay strong because I was in front of him. In his hand was a black suitcase; the same one I had and he was clutching onto it like he couldn't live without it.
He let me clear myself up, before leading me out the house, ignoring the shouts from his ex-girlfriend out her bedroom window.
We got in the car and even before I had closed the door, he had hit the gas, speeding down the street towards the Curtis' house and we got there before I had even realised what I had to do.
Pony rushed up to me, his hands grabbing onto mine as a hopeful grin made its way onto his face.
His cheeks were flushed and I hadn't even made it halfway through the gate before he leapt towards me.
I heard Randy's car scamper down the street, his engine, famous in this part of town. I remember when I arrived, being scared of it too.
"Was it her? Come on," his face was light even though it was dark out and I could still see his eyes twinkle with hope. I was surprised when my facial expression didn't show it, but he obviously looked past the tired look. "Zola, hurry up."
Giving his hands a little squeeze of reassurance, I let me mouth move, but no sound came out. Nothing. I couldn't say it. I couldn't watch his face fall and him hate me for even beginning to give him hope.
I couldn't.
But I did.
My head shook, from side to side, repeatedly. Enough times to make it seem real to Pony and not just another nightmare.
"No," my voice was distance and was carried away by the wind, "it wasn't her, Pony, it wasn't her."
He stepped away from me, slightly, his grasp becoming looser in mine until they completely dropped away. "It wasn't her? Are you sure?"
He was frowning, like he didn't quite believe what I was saying. Like he didn't quite believe his own ears.
"It wasn't her, Ponyboy," and then my voice caught in my throat, "I am so sorry."
I could see he was trying to smile. Try and make himself feel better, but his smile came out as a grimace and his quiet breath came out as a sob.
"So she's really dead?"
He looked at me, his eyes wide and watering and his face innocent like a child's. He had been hoping that it wasn't true; numbing himself, so it wasn't true.
"I mean if she is really dead," his voice was hoarse, "it's a good thing I didn't call Darrel and Soda up on a chance because I don't think they would have taken it so good."
Biting my tongue, I attempted to stop my own tears from falling down, but he looked in physical pain and I couldn't stop them for very long.
"She's really dead," I whispered into the night, stepping forward and brushing a tear off his cheek with the back on my hand. He lent into my touch, a sob escaping from his lips.
"I'm so sorry."
The end.
And that's a wrap.
This just seemed fitting - it seemed good to end it there. I wouldn't have known what else to write. Honestly, I just forgot about this and as I reread some of it, I really didn't have the energy to finish. But I did and I'm proud of myself.
Sorry to end it on a sad note, but that's just how I am.
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the book, there will hopefully be an epilogue to clean up loose ends, but I still don't know.
Bye and um...
Stay Gold
P.S: I'm British, so if there is anything that doesn't sound like it would fit an American character, please tell me so I can try and amend it. Thanks :)
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The Outsiders: Randy's Little Sister
Fanfictionlove noun /lʌv/ an intense feeling of deep affection Zola Anderson missed out on the childhood factor of her life; loving parents side of th...