Finding Us :.a Supernatural fanfic

Chapter two

I remember falling...
I remember falling for such a long time, it never seemed to end.
Was I dreaming?
Was that real?

I opened my eyes to see my husband sleeping next to me. He was facing me and his mouth was slightly open as he softly breathed in and out. I saw that his fist was relaxed against the sheet he had pulled up during the night.
I shot straight up and started gasping for air, trying to will the air to fill my seemingly empty lungs. Dean seemed to hear me because was suddenly he had me in his arms and was rocking me slowly.
"Shhhh." He softly let out. "Another nightmare? That's two this week." Nightmare? The fall not really happen? Did I just dream it all? Was Sam really safe? But what had he meant about this being the second? I pulled away and wiped the tears from my cheeks, feeling how warm they felt.
"Where's Sam?" Dean looked confused. I searched my husband's hazel eyes for anything, any sign of why he would be confused but I couldn't find any.
"I'm not sure why you'd ask me that." He seemed put off by my question, almost offended.
"Why I would...Dean, he jumped hell for us. He took on the devil and Michael for us. Why wouldn't I ask you that?" His eyes widened as he began laughing. Laughing? He found this amusing? His brother's sacrifice was humorous to him?
"Jumped in hell? For us? You're joking. When did I miss that little stunt because the last I saw him he didn't want to be a part of our family let alone try to save it." I couldn't believe what he was telling me. I know what I saw, I know what I remember. He saved us. Dean was a bloody mess and Sam regained control so he could save us. That had to be real. It just had to be.
"I don't understand. I...I remember..."
"Babe I don't know what you remember but that's not what happened. He left over a year ago because he loved the power the demon blood gave him more than he did us." Demon blood? He kicked that over a year ago after Jon was born. My head was spinning. I put my palm to my forehead and had to sit back against the headboard to center myself.
"Lucy? Hey baby are you alright? This one must have been a doozy. You haven't been this lost after a nightmare in a long time." That got my attention.
"Lost?"
"Yeah. Sometimes after you have a nightmare, you get lost. That's what you call it, you start remembering things from a life that simply isn't ours. It isn't real." I nodded and closed my eyes as the room was still spinning.
"How about I get breakfast started and you stay here for a little while longer? Hmm? Rest a little. I'll come get you when it's done." I just nodded. He kisses the side of my head as I tried to process what he just told me. Lost? I life that wasn't ours? What is going on?

I am so so so so so so so so sorry that I haven't posted anything is a really long time. I've been going through a lot of personal stuff and it just hasn't been possible.
I know this is short but I felt like I needed to give you something. Thank you all for your patience