Finding Us :.a Supernatural fanfic

Chapter five

"You've been back this whole time?" Dean yelled as Sam just stood there. He couldn't understand how is baby brother who he has mourned along with his wife has been back an entire year and never came for him.
"I'm sorry."
"That's all you have to say?" He yelled back. "What about the last year? I've been a mess and these kids...god Sam. Has Lucy been around too? Are you both hiding from me?" Dean couldn't believe the anger building inside of him. He never thought Sam was capable of doing this.
"As far as I know, it's just me. I didn't even know Lucy was gone."

"Lucy?" I heard Dean say from the door way. I just pulled my comforter tighter and curled into myself. It's been a full day since Dean dropped the bomb that obliterated my entire world and I still haven't gotten out of bed.
"Damn it Lucy. This is exactly why I didn't want to say anything. Every time we go through this. You spend a week in bed and I have to wait around and pray you'll make it through this time. Baby I'm sorry but please get out of bed. Let's go for a walk." I pushed the blanket out of my face and sat upright to face Dean.
"You're kidding right? Dean my world just flipped on it's side and you want me to go on living like nothings changed?"
"Luce, sweetie, I understand this is a lot. These dreams take so much from you every time they happen and you need to readjust. I know this is difficult and it kills me. I have to keep watching you relive this pain over and over again. Just...let's go outside. Take a walk, get some fresh air and we can talk. Or not if you'd rather not. Please? I'm begging you." Seeing the pain in my husband's eyes hit my heart and I couldn't say no. I just nodded as he handed me my sweater.

"Dean, I had something come up so can you please get Ben from practice? DJ is also at the library needing a ride. And we also need some things from the market, the list is on the fridge?" Lisa yelled from the front hallway. Dean turned to see her grabbing her keys out of her purse.
"Uh, yeah I'll get them. Can you...please come in here." Dean said standing from the couch as Sam stood from the arm chair. Lisa froze when she looked up to see him.
"De..Dean what's going on?" Dean cleared his throat, looking at his shoes.
"Somehow, Sam came back. A year ago." Sam looked at his older brother with pressed lips. He clearly wasn't letting that little thing go.
"A year? Wh...where's Lucy?" Dean shrugged as did Sam.
"We don't know at this moment but we plan on figuring that out. We're going to find her, she doesn't belong in the cage anymore than Sam did." Lisa nodded and backed out of the room, never taking her eyes off Sam.
"Well, I'm going to go. Ben will be done in about 10 minutes and DJ will be waiting with him. I picked up Connie and she's upstairs with Jonny." She explained before walking out the door. Dean turned to his brother before going to pack up his youngest children and get his older two.

Dean and I walked for a good hour before I said anything.
"Why did we choose not to have any other children?" I asked. Dean stopped walking and pulled me to face him.
"Because the pain from losing DJ hurt too damn much. We didn't want to go through that again. With my life, why would we even want to chance it? DJ was something that happened when we were teenagers. We couldn't control that but now we can."
"You talk about Deej like he was a mistake." I saw pain flash in his eyes but it was gone just as fast and it came.
"I loved our son. Hell I still do. I wish to god we never lost him but we did and we have to get through that. I would have loved to have more children but it's just not worth the risk. This life is too dangerous." I started walking again and soon he followed but then I suddenly stopped.
"Luce? What is it?" Dean asked me, turning to face me again.
"Then quit." I answered. "Quit hunting."

I am SOOOOOO sorry for the long wait for an update. I was in and out of the hospital the last few months and I haven't been up to writing much. Hopefully I can get back into a routine of getting these updates done sooner.