Child Of The Future

Episode 36: Please Don't Forget Me

Somehow this chapter and chapter 37 switched and it was terrible so, yeah. chapter 37 popped up before this one. sigh. I think I fixed it but I'm not sure.

-2 Days Prior-

              

               "We're gonna be ok..." I breathe through my mouth and hold my head. "We're gonna be ok. He's ok...He's ok." I shut my eyes, a twig snapping somewhere in the distance while I sit on a fallen log, a pattern of panic shaking me before I verbally choke on a cry, biting my lip to keep from sobbing outright, but it's no use.

               Of course it's no use!

               I'm as emotional as I've ever been. I clamp my hands over my mouth and just sit, crying and falling apart at the knowledge that Carl and I aren't together. I mean fvck, the mission, going home, it's important but...But Carl.

               "What do I do?" I ask him like a lunatic. "What do I do?"

               I've been crying for hours! My leg and body ache, my mind is on full attention...and I'm scared. If not because of what could happen out here, then by what could've happened to Carl.

               The possibility that...I'll never see him again.

               I feel sick.

               "Haaa..." I blow out warm breath onto my hands, I should at least try to keep my fingertips from freezing, but this skirt I'm wearing has little ability to actually keep me decently covered in this morning chill, and I'm surrounded by mist with pale sunlight falling down past the dead trees around me.

               Ok. Ok.

               What do I need? What do I want?

               Obviously, that's to actually find Carl, so, to help with what I want, I have to get my as$ off this log, stop crying, and...Go back.

               Go back.

               Great! How am I supposed to go back?! I ran in the dark, for hours it felt! Go back?!

               "Geh...That's right Spes." I sigh. "Go back." For what feels like the millionth fvcking time, I run my hands through my hair, the medium length growing longer and looking more badas$ grunged than before, and I touch the frigid metal handle on my saber, then idiotically double check to make sure my cameo is still on me.

               "Oh gosh...Can't this just be a dream? A nightmare?"

               I've had enough in the past few days; I wish this were one of them.

               "One minute...by the fire, next minute...by myself." I openly confirm while I force a scoff, wiping my nose and lashes once again until I feel the race of pain, its leftover strength inside me, making an appearance.

               Fvck. Last night I was too scared to give a sh1t about this, my head was a bit pre-occupied with a herd of Infected chasing after me, and when I found out that Carl and I got separated. Didn't exactly have time to worry about my insides being all bruised.

               Dammit!

               I should've just went with my stupidity and pushed through them! I don't know! Tried my best to actually meet Carl again on the other side? Anything would've been better than this!