Every time Jak asks a question, I almost keep calling him a jackass. ...You know, 'cause, "Jak asked."
Gourmet 3: Science Kingdom
"Put the Ottsel down, lady!" Jak demanded, training his Vulcan on the queenly woman. "Who are you, and where did you come from?!"
"You may address me as Queen Victoria." (From Pirates! Band of Misfits.)
"Queen Victoria?!" Yuzu exclaimed. "Then Jinta was right! Queen Victoria really DID bargain with the angels for immortality!"
"What?" Augustus asked. "Get ahold of yourself, this is probably just some woman with a queen comple-"
"SILENCE!" Victoria commanded, the edge of her knife touching Daxter. "I came here for the Precursor Pair, but I don't mind leaving with this little delicacy. So, will you hand over the soup or not?"
"Hah!" Daxter scoffed. "This old hag sure is afraid to fight—aaaack!" Victoria tightened her grip.
"You're a member of Gourmet Corp., aren't you?" Augustus asked. "I know you guys ain't good sports, but we found this soup fair and square."
"Augustus, don't say that!" Yuzu shouted. "Let's just give it to her, we already let Gourmerry try it!"
"Damn right!" Jak argued. "I ain't letting you sacrifice Daxter over some dumb soup!"
"Just look at this lady. No way she can take all of us." August smirked. "And if she wants to eat Daxter, she couldn't just kill him right now."
"I beg your pardon?" asked Victoria.
"I just KNEW you would double-cross us!" Daxter yelled. "Kick his ass, Jak!"
"Miran society is built on the bodies of gigantic creatures, including this island. That's why there are so many sources of fresh Nature Chi, much like this Precursor Pair. And if you wanna bring out the full flavor of an Ottsel, you'd have to dip them in a pool of Light Chi and coat their fur gold, but it won't work if they're dead. I read about a hunter who did that. They said the taste was like a rich butter on a tender piece of sweet meat. They seasoned a bit of it with pepper that grows at Lavover Village, by the volcano, and mmm boy, did they make it sound good."
"Buttery fur... w-with Lavover Pepper..." Victoria seemed to become awash in daydreams, her mouth drooling. "Ottsel—AAAH!" Jak KICKED her in the jaw and knocked her back, dropping Daxter as he flipped onto his friend's shoulders.
"Damn, Jak, since when do you kick old ladies?"
"This one just pisses me off."
"Eh, don't beat yourself up for it." Augustus shrugged. "If she came out this far, she must have some merit. Gourmet Corp. doesn't just hire anybody. Well, except for Shy Guy grunts, I guess. Let's get going before she wakes up." He hurried past the fallen woman, the others following as Yuzu put a lid over the pan. "Check it out, another passage." The wall of the corridor they had passed through was open. "She must've come this way. We can probably go out-"
"Giiive baaack my OTTSEL..." Victoria began to rise like a zombie, the group readying their selves. "I want Ottsel for dinner, and I want it NOW!" Her neck suddenly stretched!
"AAH!" yelped the girls. Victoria's arms became black wings, her legs became birdlike, but with sneakers, and she assumed the body of an ostrich. "She's an ostrich?!" asked Daxter.
"She's a Devil Fruit eater!" Augustus deduced.
"We can take her, right?" Jak asked.
"Let's just get outta here, come on!" August lifted Tama on his shoulders and ran. (Play "Dark Eco Plant" from Jak!)
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Nextgen Kids: Legend of the Nine Newborn
FanfictionThe 5th saga of the Nextgen Series, the 2nd half of the Newborn Era. Following the intensity of the Pirate Wars, the Kids Next Door--army of talented and superpowered kids and teens, heroes of the war and of the universe--take some time to unwind at...