Fifty Layers Of Onions

-Chapter Two-

As Shrek was running away from his beloved swamp & Fiona, he had then realised he was only half way from Lord Farquards castle & onion farm.

Shrek continues walking until the sweet, sweet scent of onion errupts his sniffing holes. Shrek gets a instant boner and jumps into the onion farm, eating every onion on the way to the castle.

He kept eating and eating on the way to the castle and suddenly stopped when he was greeted by a blue dildo. "Hello," the dildo spoke in a low scruff voice, "What could you be possibly doing in this onion farm at this time of day?"

"I am eating, I is very very hungry" shrek spoke as his shrektum expanded. Shrek open his eyes wider at the dildos appearance. "Be on your way then!" The dildo spoke, bouncing away as he vibrated across the paddock.

shrek smiled widely and continue eating, leaving his onion layers everywhere, all fifty of them. "shreeeeuuuuuk!" the other dildo spoke, this one was pink.

"Shreeeeeeiiiiiiuuuuuuuuukkkk" The dildo vibrated. Shrek ran to the pink dildo in the paddock, the castle in sight now.

"Yeeiiiiiiissss?" Shrek asked the pink dildo. "Do you prehaps know where my blue "buddie" went?" the dildo asked shrek as he had just finished eating his 6745839 onion.

Shrek has pointed into the direction that the blue dildo had vibrated away to, stuffing his face with his 6745840th onion.

"Thaaaaaaannnnnkkkkssss." The pink dildo said, vibrating away.

Shrek had then whipped out his computer dick and began watching the trailer for "The boy with girly hair" ( a/n: watch vid now )

after about 375389 hours of frolicking in the onion farm, shrek had finally reached the castle which Lord Farquard lived.

"Lord Farquard!" I shouted in my scottish accent, in search of Lord Farquard.

I run around the castle, leaving my onion odor behind until i finally reach his room. I slightly push the door open and find him eating some onions.

I shut the door behind me and watch as Lord Farquad spins around and faces me "Shrek!" He screams with his big head.

I smile at him and walk over to him and embrace him in a small hug. "You smell of onions again... and Fiona." I start to tear up once again.

spinning around and taking a few steps, "dont mention her." I say forcing myself not to cry. "she... cheated on me and my onioness."

"shrek!" he screams and hugs me "are you ok?" he asks me.

"yeah, I guess." i say in a low tone and make my way over to the bed, sitting down.

"shrek," Lord farquad says taking my green, onion odored hand into his own, grasping it.

"Ive been meaning to tell you this for so long shrek but, you've been with fiona and... well... I was scared of ever telling you--" he stops and take the sheet of the bed and begins eating it.

"well," He says with a mouth full of fabric, "I love you shrek." he says standing up making his way over to me with feathers sticking out of his mouth.

Our eyes meet and lord farquad plants a kiss onto my lips and moves back slowly.

Suddenly, the 3 blind mice and puss in boots walk in, all wearing massive straps ons, begin fucking on the peices of chewed up sheets.

-

// Dragons POV //

I open one eye and hear the sound of kissing and shit being thrown around the onion farm.

I look out of the small window, my pee everywhere. "The Fuck is that?!" I ask loudly. I need to get out of here. I shrink my dick and then fly out the window with my dick wings heading towards the noise

Loud groans escape from the bedrooms of lord farquads castle.

I fly through his bedroom to find the 3 blind mice and puss in boobs having a foursome. I spread fire all over the room, setting everything on fire, even the onion layers.

// Shreks POV //

I take a sharp left turn to find donkey and Fiona making out again, he stares at me and continues making out with her.

"Donkey.." I say, turning away and walking as tears stream down my face .

"Shrek!" he screams after me "Shrek, I never meant for you to see that.." He adds.

"Whatever," I say eating another onion "It's not like you give a fuck anyway."

"Let me explain." he says. "Shrek, I have loved you this whole time, I have loved you since we were 18 and well, I'm ready to run. I never meant to steal your girl to make it seem like that, It was just a illusion to make you jealous because.. I was jealous.."

I manage a smile which quickly fades... "Donkey, I can never love you im afraid." I say as I shove a golden dildo up my ass.

"UM CAN YOU GUYS HURRY THE FUCK UP WITH YOUR SKANK ASS TALK" Fiona screams "THE 3 BLIND MICE HAVE INVITED ME AND DONKEY TO A SIXSOME WITH THEM AT THE CASTLE.

-

HEY GUYS TF ITS DOIN YALLLLLLL, THIS IS MY NEW FAN FIC AND SHIT AND YE OK ILY KEEP READING PLS.