Your Ghost

Chapter 23:

4 Days.

I have 4 days left until I can go home. I could just stay with Lydia, but I know she will gloat about me falling for Ransom's ways - yet again - and I will never hear the end of it - even though she would be right. I know I am falling back into Ransom's ways, but it is so hard to refrain from it. I mean, I can refrain from his ways, but the minute he kisses me...I want more from him the moment he places his lips over mine. Argh! Why does he have to be so damn addicting?

I hear my alarm go off and I open my eyes in direct sunlight.

Shit!

The unfortunate part about having blue eyes is that they hurt even more than other eye colors when in direct sunlight. I scrunch my eyes and turn over so that I am looking at the ceiling, but the sun is still shining on my eyes.

Seriously?

I turn over once more and I am face to face with Ransom. His eyes are moving rapidly, but he is sound asleep. He might be dreaming...and he looks so beautiful. His eyelashes are so long. I swear no other man I have met has long lashes like Ransom does. Jake's eye lashes seemed long, but not as long as Ransom's.

Dammit! I hate that I still find him attractive! Why did I have to fall in love with Ransom?

This is a man who physically hurt me, but then apologized after he hurt me.

Or was that a dream?

I shift back around so that my back is toward him.

The sun is burning my eyes again!

That's it! I sit up and get out the bed, but that was not a smart move. I fall right onto the floor and I whimper in agony. My. Entire. Body. Hurts!

From my shoulders to my legs, I can feel every muscle in my body move. It hurts! I feel like someone who had a bad fall from jumping into a pool.

I manage to stand up and wobble my way to the window so that I can close the curtains. I then decide to crawl toward the bed instead of walking. If I could, I would rather go down stairs than be in this bedroom. I really don't want to be around Ransom.

He said last night that he wanted me to be sore the next day! Well he got his wish didn't he?

I lay back on the bed and I lay on my back so that I am looking at the ceiling. My mind ponders back to last night: I know I allowed Ransom to control me in the study, but once we were in that room, the room I have never seen or heard about before, something changed in Ransom. He changed completely into someone I couldn't be around. I saw the Ransom I broke up with. Heartless, no compassion, only caring for himself Ransom. The asshole he ended up becoming.

I do wonder if I should just end my relationship with Ransom, or if I should give it another shot?

I have 4 days left in this house, so I decide on this: If I see Ransom is going back to the possessive, vile person I despise, then I will end my relationship with him. Completely.

Sadly, that will be a hard task to follow through since Ransom will not accept my decision if I do break off our relationship. He will become possessive and he will find ways to drive me back to him. I will probably grieve for days and days if I ended our relationship, and I will invariably see Ransom when I visit Harlan. He would make sure that he is around just to torture me. He would even hook up with some poor woman just to make me suffer. That is his asshole side that I hate.

That room...I saw the possessive side of Ransom, the side that I cannot be with. Something happened to him in that room. When I looked into his eyes, I could see that he wanted to have full control over me and I had a disturbing feeling in my gut that he wanted to hurt me.