Angelus Carduus

Chapter 1: Valeria Rubis

In a mediocre room painted all white, a single bed was placed beside the window together with wires and machines beeping in a rhythmic manner.

There laid a girl in her teen age. Wires from the machines attached to her body, allowing her to live. She sat on her bed with a calm smile on her face as she gazed out of the window.

From her window she could see people walking around and chatting. The nurses were pushing the wheelchairs while others were visitors chatting.

A sigh escaped her pale cracked lips, "How peaceful.." she spoke to herself.

She didn't envy them. She used to be able to do that so she had no reason to feel that way.

As she continued looking out the window, a knock on the door was heard before a doctor came in with her health chart. She noticed a complicated expression on his face.

She shot him a smile before weakly raising her voice in order for him to hear her,

"Good afternoon doctor.." she spoke in a cheery voice though still not quite loud enough.

He nodded and weakly smiled at her before looking back at her health chart in his hands. He flipped through it and gazed over at her.

"Valeria.." he started but she raised her hand and shook her head.

"It's almost time isn't it?" she questioned.

He closed his eyes shut and nodded. "I'm afraid so..."

She turned away back to the window with a warm smile on her face, "Is that so?"

"Please forgive me, after all I've done in the end I still-"

"Doctor why are you apologising?" Valeria turned back at him and laughed.

His head was bowed down and his eyes reflected guilt and regret.

"Because I'm unable to save you from your illness..after all these years.."

"It's not your fault doctor. You and I knew that once I had this illness, I would never live. It is a miracle I was able to still be alive until now." she smiled.

She lied back down on her pillow and closed her eyes. "The greatest gift now will be for me to leave quietly in peace."

"What about your parents? They will be here soon."

"It doesn't matter. They will cry and apologise to me for not being able to save me as well. It's better for me to leave before they come." she replied to her doctor.

She already knew she would leave today. Her heart wasn't beating regularly anymore, she could feel her life slipping away from her fingertips but it was okay.

She had been wishing for this for so long. Ever since she knew she caught an incurable illness.

She wished to live but if she couldn't it was fine as well. Dying is part of life too.

With her eyes fluttered shut, she saw her life flash before her eyes. She found out she had an incurable illness when she was ten.

Valeria could still faintly remember when she suddenly felt her heart beating uncontrollably in a painful manner. The dirt and gravel that dugged into her skin as she fell to the ground while she was playing with her friends.

The screams of panic that surrounded her before she was sent to the hospital and was hit with the news of an incurable illness.

The pain she thought she would never be able to handle slowly became numb until she barely noticed it was there. Medicines and alcohol smells that were nauseating became her everyday life.